Why do some people say "that said" or "that being said" instead of just saying "but"?

Technically they do the same thing, but "that said" just hits different. It adds weight and diplomacy that a simple "but" lacks.

Here’s why it works better:

The biggest difference

• "But" acts like a U-turn. It tends to negate or minimize whatever you just said.
  • "He’s hardworking, but not smart."
    Sounds like the "hardworking" part doesn't matter; the point is he's dumb.
• "That said" holds two truths. It validates the first point before adding the second.
  • "He’s hardworking. That said, he’s not smart."
    Acknowledges the hard work is real/valuable, while noting the intelligence issue. It respects the first half of the sentence.

2. The "Breath" between ideas
"But" is a comma; "That said" is a period.

• If you’ve just spent 3 minutes explaining a heavy or complex problem, dropping a quick "but" feels way too abrupt.
• "That being said" forces a pause. It gives the listener a mental breath before you pivot to the counter-argument.

3. Office Politics (Diplomacy)
In a work setting, "but" can sound argumentative or defensive.

• “We messed up, but we fixed it.” (Defensive)
• “We messed up. That said, we’ve implemented a fix.” (Objective/Professional)
• It’s a manager's favorite tool because it softens the blow of bad news. It makes you sound reasonable rather than emotional.

4. It buys your brain time
Honestly, sometimes it’s just a stall tactic.

• Saying "but" takes 0.1 seconds.
• Saying "that being said" takes nearly 2 seconds.
• It’s a filler phrase that lets you formulate your next complex thought without an awkward silence.

Bottom Line:

• Use "But" for quick contrasts (I'm hungry but broke).
• Use "That said" when you need to be polite, handle a complex topic, or respect the point you just made before disagreeing with it.