老爸老妈浪漫史How I Met Your Mother第1季第1集台词
英文 | 中文 |
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2030年 | |
Kids, I'm going to tell you an incredible story. | 孩子们,我要给你们讲一个美好的故事 |
the story of how I met your mother. | 是关于我和你们母亲相遇的故事 |
Are we being punished for something? | 我们是不是做错什么事情了? |
No. | 不是 |
-Is this going to take a while? -Yes. | -这会不会讲很久 -是的 |
25 years ago, before I was dad, I had this whole other life. | 25年前,我还没当父亲的时候 我的生活可大不相同 |
It was way back to 2005. | 这可要回到2005年 |
I was 27,just starting to make it as an architect and living in New York with Marshal, my best friend from college. | 我还只有27岁,有一份建筑师的工作 和我大学时代最好的朋友Marshal合住在纽约 |
My life was good, and then uncle Marshal went to screw the whole thing up. | 本来我的生活一切OK 然后你们的Marshal叔叔把一切都搞砸了 |
Will you marry me? | 你愿意嫁给我吗? |
查看完整请点击 | |
Yes, perfect, and you're engaged. | 太好了,完美,你要订婚了 |
You pop up the champagne. You drink a toast. You have sex on the kitchen floor. | 你开香槟,祝酒辞,然后在厨房地板上嘿咻 |
Don't have sex on our kitchen floor. | 别在厨房地板上嘿咻 |
Got it. | 明白 |
Thanks for helping me plan this out, Ted. | 谢谢你帮我这个忙,Ted |
Are you kidding? It's you and Lily! | 开什么玩笑,这可是你和Lily! |
I've been there for all the big moment of you and Lily. | 你们俩所有的关键时刻 我都在一旁帮助你的 |
The night you met, your first date, | 你们第一次相见,第一次约会…… |
other first things. | 还有其他的“第一次”…… |
Sorry, we thought you were asleep. | 呵呵,不好意思 我们还以为你睡着了呢 |
It's physics, Marshal. If the bottom bunk moves, the top bunk moves, too. | 这就是物理学,Marshal 下铺摇动,上铺也会跟着摇动 |
My God! | 上帝啊 |
You're getting engaged tonight! | 你今晚就要订婚了 |
Yeah. | 是啊 |
What are you doing tonight? | 你今晚有什么计划? |
What was I doing? | 我那晚干什么了来着? |
Your uncle Marshal was taking the biggest step of his life. And me? | 你们的Marshal叔叔踏出了人生的关键一步 而我呢……? |
I'm calling up your uncle Barney. | 我给你们的Barney叔叔打了电话 |
Hey, see, you know, however, I thought I had a thing for half Asian girls? | 嘿,伙计,还记得我说过 我对一半亚洲血统的小妞有偏好吗 |
Well, now I've got a new favourite, | 现在我有新爱了 |
Lebanese girls. | 黎巴嫩妞儿 |
Lebanese girls are the new half Asians. | 黎巴嫩妞儿代表了新的半亚洲血统 |
Hey, you want to do something tonight? | 嘿,今晚有什么计划没? |
OK, meet me at the bar in 15 minutes, | 好的,15分钟后酒吧见 |
and suit up! | 记得穿西服! |
Hey. | 嘿 |
Where is your suit? | 你的西装呢? |
-Just once when I say 'suit up', I wish you'd put on a suit. -I did, that one time. | -我跟你说穿得好一点,就是说要你穿上西服! -我穿过……一回 |
It was a blazer. | 那是件夹克! |
You know, ever since college it's been Marshal and Lily and me. | 你知道吗,从大学开始 一直都是Marshal,Lily和我 |
Now it's going to be Marshal and Lily, and me. | 而以后就会变成 Marshel和Lily……和我 |
They'll get married, start a family. | 他们就要结婚,成家了 |
Before long I'm that weird, middle-aged bechalor, their kids call 'uncle Ted'. | 以后我就是他们家小孩眼里 古怪的中年单身汉Ted叔叔了 |
I see what this is about. | 我知道这是怎么回事了 |
Have you forgotten what I said to you the night we met? | 你忘记我们第一回见面的时候 我怎么跟你说的了吗? |
Ted, I'm going to teach you how to live. | Ted,我来教你怎么享受生活 |
Barney. We met at the urinal. | 我是Barney,我们刚在小便池边认识的 |
Oh, alright. | 哦 |
Alright. | 你好 |
Lesson one, lose the goatee. | 第一课,跟你的山羊胡子说再见 |
It doesn't go with your suit. | 它和你的西服不搭配 |
-I'm not wearing a suit. -Lesson two, get a suit. | -我没穿西服 -第二课,穿上西服 |
Suits are cool, exhibitive. | 西服很好,有模有样 |
Lesson 3, don't even think about getting married till you're 30. | 第三课,千万别想结婚的事情 ……三十岁以后再说 |
30, right, you're right. | 三十岁,是的,你是对的 |
I guess that just your best friends get engaged, you start thinking about that stuff. | 我想当你最好的朋友订婚的时候 你难免考虑一些有的没的 |
I thought I was your best friend. | 我以为我才是你最好的朋友 |
Ted, say I'm your best friend. | Ted,说我才是你最好的朋友 |
-You're my best friend, Barney. -Good, | -你是我最好的朋友,Barney -很好…… |
and as your best friend, I suggest we play a little game I'd like to call | 作为你最好的朋友,我提议玩一点小游戏 我愿意称之为…… |
-'have you met Ted'. -No, we are not playing 'have you met Ted.' | -“你见过Ted没有” -不不不,我们不玩这个游戏 |
Hi, have you met Ted? | 嗨,你见过Ted没有? |
Hi! | 你好 |
I'm Ted. | 我是Ted |
查看完整请点击 | |
Yasmin Yasmin. | |
It's a very pretty name. | 很好听的名字 |
Thanks. It's Lebanese. | 谢谢,这来源于黎巴嫩语 |
I'm exhausted. It was finger painting day at school. | 我都累坏了,今天是学校里的涂鸦日 |
A 5-year-old boy got to second base with me. | 一个5岁的小鬼,上了我的二垒 |
Wow, are you cooking? | 哇哦,你在做饭吗? |
Yes, I am. | 是的,没错 |
Are you sure that's a good idea | 你肯定这是个好主意吗? |
after last time you looked really creepy without eyebrows. | 要知道上回之后,你没眉毛的样子很吓人 |
I can handle this. So think you'll find I'm full of surprise tonight. | 我应付的来,今晚是惊喜之夜 |
So there's more surprises? Like what? | 还有什么样的惊喜? |
Marshal was in the second year of law school, so he was pretty good at thinking on his feet. | Marshal正在读法律,所以他急中生智很有一套 |
And that's all of them! | 就是这个 |
I'm going to go cook. | 我该去……做饭了 |
I'm so happy for Marshal. I really am. I just couldn't imagine settling down right now. | 我真的很为Marshal感到高兴 我只是无法想象现在就成家立业 |
So do you think you'll ever get married? | 那你还会结婚吗? |
Well, maybe eventually | 嗯,最后总会结的 |
Some fall day | 比如在一个秋天…… |
possibly in Central Park | 也许在中央公园…… |
simple ceremony, we are better on vows. | 仪式就简单点,我们更注重誓约 |
band, no DJ, people will dance. I'm not going to worry about it. | 乐队,不要DJ,人们各跳各的 我才懒得管呢 |
Damn it! Why did Marshal have to get engaged! | 见鬼,Marshal干嘛这么早订婚 |
Yeah, nothing hotter than a guy planning out his imaginary wedding. | 好笑吧,一个男的想象自己的婚礼 |
Actually I think it's cute. | 实际上,我觉得很可爱啊 |
Well, you're clearly drunk. | 看样子你肯定喝多了 |
One more for the lady. | 给这位小姐再来一杯 |
Oh, hey, look what I got. | 哦,对了,瞧瞧我弄了点什么 |
Oh, honey, champagne! | 哦,亲爱的,香槟 |
No, you're too old to be scared to open a bottle of champagne. | 不行,这么大个人还怕开香槟? |
I'm not scared. | 我没害怕 |
-Then open it. -Fine. | -那就打开 -好的 |
Please open it. | 还是你来吧 |
You're unbelievalbe, Marshal ... | 老天啊,真不敢相信…… |
There are two big questions a man has to ask in life: | 一个男人一生中有两个重要问题会问出口 |
one you planned out for months, the other just slipps out when you're half drunk at some bar. | 一个你要精心策划好几个月 而另一个则是在某个酒吧里半醉之中脱口而出 |
Will you marry me? | 嫁给我好吗? |
You want to go out sometime? | 想约个时间出去玩儿吗? |
Of course, you idiot! | 当然愿意,你个傻瓜 |
I'm sorry, Carl's my boyfriend. | 对不起,Carl是我的男朋友 |
What's up, Carl? | 你好,Carl |
I promised Ted we wouldn't do that. | 我答应过Ted不会这样的 |
Did you know there is a pop under your fridge? | 你注意到冰箱底下漏水了吗? |
No, but dips. | 没有,管他呢 |
Where's that champagne? | 香槟在哪儿? |
I want to drink a toast | 我想庆祝一下 |
with my fiancee. | 和我的未婚妻 |
Hard to know I was so scared at this. | 这有什么好怕的 |
It's pretty easy, right? | 多简单,不是吗? |
Why am I freaking out all of a sudden. This is crazy. I'm not ready to get settled down. | 我怎么突然之间这么饥渴了,真荒唐 我还没准备要找老婆呢 |
How does Carl lend a Lebanese girl? | Carl怎么勾搭上一个黎巴嫩小妞的 |
-The plan's always been, don't even think about it until you're 30. -Exactly. | -应该是三十岁之前不想结婚这事 -没错 |
The guy doesn't even own a suit. | 这家伙根本就不穿西服的 |
Plus, Marshal's found the love of his life. | 况且,Marshel已经找到了他终生挚爱 |
Even if I was ready, which I'm not, | 就算我已经准备好了,事实上我不是…… |
but if I was, it's like, | 但假设我想结婚了,就好像…… |
'OK, I'm ready, where is she?' | “好了,我准备了,可她在哪儿?” |
And there she was. | 她就这样出现了 |
It was like something from an old movie, | 这就好像老电影里的情节 |
with a sailor sees the girl across the crowded dance floor, turns to his buddy, and says, 'see that girl? | 一个水手看见舞池对面的她 然后转身对自己的同伴说:“瞧见那姑娘了吗?” |
I'm going to marry her some day.' | “总有一天我会娶到她” |
-Hey, Barney, See that girl? -Oh, yeah, you just know that she likes dirty. | -Barney,瞧见那姑娘了吗? -哦,是的,性感身段 |
-Go say 'hi.' -I can't just go say 'hi.' | -过去打个招呼 -我不能就这么走过去 |
I need a plan. | 我得有个计划 |
I'm going to wait until she goes to the bathroom. | 我要等到她上洗手间的时候…… |
I'll strategically place myself by the jukebox... | 再偷偷给她点一杯饮料…… |
Hi, have you met Ted? | 你见过Ted没有? |
Let me guess, Ted? | 我猜猜,你应该是Ted了 |
Sorry, Lily, I'm so sorry. | 对不起,Lily,我真的很抱歉 |
Take us to the hospital. | 送我们去医院 |
Did you hit her? | 你是不是打了她? |
Hit me? Please! | 打我?得了吧 |
This guy can barely even spank me in bed for fun. | 这小子连在床上打我屁股都不会 |
He's all like, 'Oh, honey, did that hurt?' | 他就这么(轻拍一下) 然后赶忙说:“哦,亲爱的,没弄疼你吧” |
And I'm like, 'Oh, come on! Let me have you, pansy.' | 而我就说 “使劲些,让我尝尝你的厉害,娘娘腔” |
Wow, complete stranger. | 哇哦,有个陌生人 |
No, it's OK, go on. | 不不不不,没关系,继续说 |
So what do you do? | 你是做哪一行的? |
I'm a reporter from Metronews One. | 我是都市新闻一台的记者 |
Kind of a reporter. | 算半个播报员吧 |
I do those dumb little fluff pieces at the end of the news, you know, like, | 我总是在新闻之后播报一些无意义的小消息 比如…… |
monkey can play the ukulele. | 猴子会弹ukulele (夏威夷的四弦琴) |
I'm hoping to get some bigger stories soon. | 希望以后能够播报一些大新闻 |
Bigger like, gorilla with an upright bass? | 大一点的?就好比…… 大猩猩演奏贝丝? |
I'm sorry. You're really pretty. | 不好意思,你看起来真漂亮 |
Oh, your friends don't seem too happy. | 你的朋友看起来心情不好 |
Yeah, see the one in the middle just got dumped by her boyfriend, so tonight, | 中间那个刚被男朋友甩了 所以今晚…… |
every guy is the "enemy". | 所有男人都是“敌人” |
You know if it'll make your friend feel better, you could throw a drink in my face. I don't mind. | 如果想要你朋友开心的话,你可以往我脸上泼饮料 我不介意的 |
She would love that. | 她肯定会喜欢的 |
It does look fun in the movies. | 电影里这种情节都很有趣 |
Hey, you want to have dinner with me Saturday night? | 周六晚上有时间共进晚餐吗? |
Oh, I can't. I'm going to Orlando for a week on Friday. | 我周五要去Orlando一个星期 |
Some guy's attempting to make the world's biggest pancake. Guess who's covering it? | 有个人要做一个世界上最大的蛋糕 我要负责这个报导 |
-That's going to take a week? -Yes. He's going to eat it, too. That's another record. | -这能报导一个星期? -是的,他还会把蛋糕吃掉,这也是个世界纪录 |
Hey, what's taking so long? | 怎么回事那么久? |
I know this is a long shot, but how about tomorrow night? | 我知道这有些唐突,不过明晚怎么样? |
Yeah, what the hell? | 好吧,管他呢 |
Jerk! | 混球! |
That was fun. | 真好玩 |
De -- wait for it -- nied! | 拒……稍等……绝了! |
Denied! | 拒绝了 |
We're going out tomorrow night. | 明晚佳人有约 |
I thought we were playing laser attack tomorrow night! | 我以为我们明晚一起玩激光枪大战呢 |
Yeah, I was never going to play laser attack. | 没错,不过我从没打算玩激光枪大战 |
The next night, I took her out to this little in Brooklyn. | 第二天,我带她去了一家Brooklyn的小酒馆 |
Wow, that is one bad ass boof French horn. | 哇哦,那可真是个蓝色的法国喇叭 (双关,亦可理解为法国色情电影) |
Yeah, so it looks like a smurf penis. | 看到它我就想起了蓝精灵的阳具 |
Son, a piece of advice. | 孩子们,给你们一些建议 |
When you go on a first date, you really don't want to say 'smurf penis.' | 第一次约会的时候,你千万不要说“蓝精灵的阳具” |
Girls don't ordinarilly like that. | 一般情况下,女孩子们不想到这种东西 |
But this was no ordinary girl. | 不过这个女孩可不一般 |
Lily? Lily? | |
How have you been sitting there? | 你在这儿坐了多久了? |
The stupid odd patch! | 愚蠢的眼罩 |
Mom, dad, I have found the future Mrs. Ted Mosbie! | 老爸,老妈,我已经找到了未来的Ted Mosbie夫人 |
Marshal, how have I always described my perfect woman? | Marshal,我都是怎么描述我的梦中情人的 |
I'll let see. | 我想想 |
She likes dogs? | 她爱狗 |
I've got 5 dogs. | 我有5支狗 |
She drinks scotch? | 爱喝苏格兰威士忌 |
I love a scotch that's old enough to own it's own scotch. | 我自从饮酒年龄开始就爱喝苏格兰威士忌了 |
Can quote obsure lines from 'Ghost Busters?' | 她喜欢引用《捉鬼敢死队》里的台词? |
'Ray, when someone ask you if you're God, you say yes!' | “Ray,要是别人问你是不是上帝 你就说是!” |
And I'm saving the best for last. | 我把最带劲的留到最后 |
Do you want this? I hate olives. | 你想吃这个吗?我讨厌橄榄果 |
She hates olives! Awesome! | 她讨厌橄榄果,太棒了 |
The olive theory! | 橄榄果理论 |
The olive theory is based on my friends Marshal and Lily. | 橄榄果理论来自于我的朋友Marshal和Lily |
He hates olives. She loves them. And that makes them such a great couple. | 他不喜欢橄榄果,而她喜欢 而奇怪的是他们却又是幸福的一对 |
Perfect balance. | 完美的平衡 |
You know, I've had a jar of olives just sitting in my fridge forever. | 要知道,我有一罐橄榄果 好像在我的冰箱里呆了足足一个世纪了 |
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