Speaker：Esther Perel
Key words：性欲 爱 心理
Abstract：拥有vs 想要，安全感vs惊喜，面对长期关系，我们挣扎在两者之间。对长期伴侣保持欲望有两点秘诀：1、距离感 2、新奇
Content：
good and committed sex two conflicting needs:
- our need for security and our need for surprise
- love is to have but desire is to want
screat/senerio to help increase your desire is to add new ingredion/new angle
- absence/reunite[phisical distance]
- novelty [show your different aspects/ find his new elemets]
Speak says:
Now, in this paradox between love and desire, what seems to be so puzzling is that the very ingredients that nurture love — mutuality, reciprocity, protection, worry, responsibility for the other — are sometimes the very ingredients that stifle desire. Because desire comes with a host of feelings that are not always such favorites of love: jealousy, possessiveness, aggression, power, dominance, naughtiness, mischief.
