Never Spilt the Difference–How to Control the Conversation

You should believe that people are irrational rather than  rational when they are making a conversation. And how can we do with it?

1. Repeat each other's words

The central thing is repeating. It means you are a good listener if you do like this.

2.Keep the voice of  radio host in the middle of the night

The speciality of this kind of voice is deep, gentle, slow and reassuring and it can calm down people.

How to use it? First, keep this kind of voice; second, the first word is "sorry" when you're talking; third, repeat each other's words; fourth, keep in silence for at least 4 seconds and wait for a magical effect; fifth, repeat the above four steps.

3. Mark the sufferings of others

You can use this method while others don't say anything. It's a tactic empathy for opening the heart of others rather than agreeing with them. It means that you understand them.  You can express yourself with the words look, seem, sound etc.

4. Examine the allegation

You can say what they dissatisfied about first, so that they would say nothing about it.

Here are part of the methods. If you would like to know more about it, you can listen to or read the book. I think it's useful for us to achieve our goals through these methods.

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