肤浅如我,如果不是Jesse我应该一辈子都不会看这种明显文艺片的纯对话电影,全片就是两个男人絮絮叨叨的对话采访。第一次看了半小时没坚持下去,随后被我转成了MP3放在Walkman里散步时听,那个晚上我在外面呆了三个小时,后程哭一会儿听一会儿,因为有一样的经历(当然我并没有那样优秀)整个片子下来感触良多,关于孤独、关于抑郁症、关于生命...一切的轨迹,这就是《无尽的玩笑》。
-i was just thinking, um,
it wasn’t a chemical imbalance, and it wasn’t drugs and alcohol,
i think, um,
it was much more that i had lived an incredibly American life.
this idea that if i could just achieve X and Y and Z, that everything would be okay.
there’s a thing in the book about how when somebody leaps from a burning skyscraper,
it’s not that they’re not afraid of falling anymore.
it’s that the alternative is so awful.
and so then you’re invited to consider what could be so awful
that leaping to your death would seem like an escape from it.
i don’t know if you have any experience with this kind of thing,
but it’s worse than any kind of physical injury.
it may be in the old days what was known as a spiritual crisis,
feeling as though every axiom in your life turned out to be false,
and there was actually nothing,
and you were nothing.
and that it’s all a delusion and you’re so much better than everybody,
cause you can see how this is just a delusion.
and you’re so much worse because you can’t fucking function,
it’s really horrible.
i don’t think that we ever change.
i’m sure that i still have those same parts of me.
guess i’m trying really hard to find a way not to let them drive, you know.
hey, um, okay, good night.