Let’s face it, the people who are obsessed with the search for happiness are usually the ones without it. The happy people just merrily go about their lives and never think about it, but people who don’t have it long for it. I was one of those lucky people born with a melancholy disposition (50% of our happiness is determined by our genes) and my childhood did not help either – As a premature baby I was sick a lot growing up. And I was always lonely as the only child. So my schoolmates gave me a nickname 林黛玉, essentially saying I was weak both physically and emotionally.
No wonder I have always been in a quest to better understand happiness, drawn to psychology and working on various ways to overcome my genetic disadvantage. I have been mildly successful in that attempt -- If the happiness scale is 1-10 with 1 being the most unhappy and 10 being the most happy, I would say where I started in life is probably a 2 and where I am today is probably a 6 or 7, not a bad improvement. How I got here has a lot to do with the success I achieved in my career, the confidence I gained as a result of that, my marriage, my age and the experience or maybe even wisdom that comes with it, but a lot of it may just be dumb luck. It was not until recently when I started to dig into the science of happiness (the biology, chemistry and neuroscience) that I found there is an easier way of approaching happiness that seems much more tangible and reliable.
There are actually 4 hormones in our body that are directly responsible for our feeling of happiness and it’s easy to remember them if you use the acronym: D.O.S.E:
D stands for Dopamine. It is the hormone most frequently associated with happiness, because it is that ecstasy we feel when we reach a goal. When someone wins the lottery, his or her dopamine level goes through the roof. And that is also the problem -- that high level of dopamine is not sustainable. It will inevitably drop so you can easily go from ecstasy to crash. And because the high dopamine level makes you feel so great, you keep wanting to get back to that level by having another goal, and yet another. That’s how people end up on the treadmill of never-ending pursuit of success with only diminishing marginal returns– the success that made us feel so great the 1st time no longer feels that great if we experience it the 2nd time, 3rd time, 4th time, so on and so forth.
O stands for Oxytocin (not to be confused with the Opioid Oxycontin). It is frequently referred to as the love hormone because love (physical and mental), trust, kisses, hugs, sex, all trigger our brain to release more Oxytocin.
S stands for Serotonin. It is considered a natural mood stabilizer. With enough serotonin in our system, we can enjoy good sleep, regulate mood and negative feelings like anxiety. Without it, we experience depression and suicidal thoughts. Interestingly, 90% of serotonin is found in the gut – indicating there is a lot of wisdom in the traditional belief that we are what we eat and that the health of our digestive system is key to our overall health.
E stands for Endorphin. It is usually linked to athletes -- it's the phenomenon that explains the runner's high or post-workout endorphin "rush." Endorphin functions as "natural painkillers" that help minimize pain and maximize pleasure. This chemical experience can explain why a runner may be able to push through a race with an injury that they don't notice until it's over.
It turns out I have been consciously and unconsciously (unconsciously for the most part) manipulating all these hormones. Dopamine is the easy one – I am the classic Type A personality, highly motivated by goals and outcomes. Dopamine has been giving me the drive all these years, and predictably I have also experienced the downside of it – addicted to success and wanting more. But I have also learned to trick the system by giving myself small achievable goals to ensure I can get these small but continuous doses of dopamine rather than relying on getting a large dose that may or may not come. In fact, there are scientific experiments that prove staying within the slightly positive range of happiness with little variability produces more sustainable feeling of happiness than violent fluctuations with extreme happiness followed by the disappointment in its loss.
Extraverts have an advantage when it comes to oxytocin. They can make social connections more easily and are more ready to spread their love, even to strangers. But introverts like me can have our own ways of inducing oxytocin. A healthy intimate relationship definitely helps – The reason why married couples are generally happier and live longer is probably due to the regular access they have to physical intimacy. But we don’t need romantic love or grand gestures of philanthropy to generate oxytocin. Having lived in the US for over 25 years, I have become somewhat a hugger, always hugging my friends and sometimes kissing my girlfriends on the cheek. Initially I did it to follow the norm, but gradually I found I actually like it – apparently I needed that Oxytocin. In his famous Ted talk, Professor Paul Zak prescribed 8 hugs a day to maintain a healthy level of oxytocin.
How we can boost our serotonin level from the digestive system is not yet well understood, but there are some sure wins. First, we can eat foods rich in tryptophan, like protein. Tryptophan is an essential amino acid that gets converted into serotonin. Now eating tryptophan rich foods does not guarantee raised level of serotonin, because it needs to go through the blood system to the brain and much will get lost in that pathway, but we would sure feel cranky if our diet lacks protein. Exercise, especially brisk walking, hiking, bicycling and swimming, seems to create a more conductive environment for tryptophan to reach our brain. Massages are very effective as well, not only in producing more serotonin, but also in suppressing cortisol, the hormone our body produces during stress. And finally my favorite way to increase serotonin – sunshine. I pay a hefty price to live in Southern California, but the sunshine does make me smile every day. Happiness is priceless – so it’s worth every penny.
Far from being an athlete, I thought I may be deprived of endorphin. Turns out while endorphin is frequently associated with athletes, you don’t have to be an athlete to solicitate it. Mildly stressful exercises bring about endorphin in your blood and the effect can be enhanced by a hot bath afterwards. Yoga, which helps to stretch your muscles, also triggers the production of endorphin. There is even evidence suggesting watching intense drama, an activity that stretches your emotional muscle, can lead to an increase in endorphin.
By now, I hope you have figured out why I’m writing this article – the motivation is purely selfish, because it gives me at least 3 doses of happiness. I get a dose of dopamine by accomplishing the goal of writing. By publishing the article and sharing my learnings, I’m connecting with my readers and spreading love in the world, which would give me a boost of oxytocin. By focusing my attention on something I enjoy doing and feeling good about what I have accomplished so far, I’m regulating my mood and getting more serotonin. Finally I’ve been writing for two hours and my neck hurts, so I may even get a dose of endorphin.
See, happiness is nothing mysterious or elusive. It does not require huge material success or an arduous spiritual journey by following some Buddhist monk or Indian guru to a cave. It is easily within our reach, if we follow the science and do it one small step at a time.
