外婆和衡阳保卫战

Grandma and Defense of Hengyang

原创：斧子       中译英：斧子的二当家

衡阳保卫战持续之弥久、战斗之惨烈、影响之深远，中国战场所有的城市防卫战，似乎没哪一仗可与堪比。

1944年6月是第二次世界大战最重要的一个月，也是同盟国与轴心国的大决战，诺曼底登陆，塞班岛大战直到中国战场的豫湘桂大会战。在这场会战中爆发了被日本列入日本陆军20大战役的衡阳保卫战。

June 1944 was the most important month of the Second World War. It was also the decisive battle between the Allies and the Axis powers, with Normandy landing, the Saipan War and the battle of Henan, Hunan, and Guangxi in Chinese battlefield fighting fiercely. In this battle, the Defense of Hengyang , which was included in Japan's 20 major army campaigns, broke out.

衡阳保卫战经过47天惨烈的战斗，第10军17600人，阵亡7400人，负伤生病7000多人，损失率达85%。而在衡阳外围，为了衡阳得以解围而艰苦作战的中国军队，根据日军战报，截止8月上旬，在衡阳外围，造成66468名中国士兵阵亡，俘虏27447名，连同伤病中国军队损失了226400人。

After 47 days of heavy fighting, the 10th Army lost 7,400 troops and more than 7,000 people were injured, as the total number was 17600, the loss rate reached 85%. On the outskirts of Hengyang, Chinese troops were also fighting hard to get Hengyang out of the siege, according to the Japanese war reports, by early August, 66,468 Chinese soldiers outside Hengyang killed, 27,447 captured, ,totally 226400 people were lost adding the injured troops.

衡阳保卫战持续之弥久、战斗之惨烈、影响之深远，中国战场所有的城市防卫战，似乎没哪一仗可与堪比。因是中国八年抗战史上敌我双方伤亡最多、中国军队正面交战时间最长的城市攻防战，被誉为“东方的莫斯科保卫战”。

The Defense of Hengyang had lasted for a long time, the fighting had been fierce and far-reaching. It seems that no other urban battles in the Chinese battlefield can be compared to it. It is known as "the Moscow defensive war in the east" because it is the city that has suffered the most casualties on both sides in China's eight-year history of resistance and the longest face-to-face fighting.

外婆的很多亲人包括父母亲就死于这场该死的战争，全家人逃散四方。外婆带着自己年幼的弟弟，病倒在路旁，幸亏遇到外公搭救，才活了下来。外婆的哥哥和妹妹，在逃难的路上走散，经过三十多年后才终于找寻到，外婆和他们抱头痛哭了几个小时，最后还大病了一场。

Many of grandma's relatives, including her parents, died in the damn war, and the whole family fled. Grandma, with her young brother, fell ill by the roadside and fortunately survived thanks to the rescue of grandpa. My grandmother's brother and sister, were scattered on the road to escape. After more than 30 years, they finally found each other. Grandmother and they cried several hours for this meeting and even got a severe sick.

正是因为遭逢过战争的磨难，外婆后来成了最虔诚的佛教徒。外婆非常羡慕能够出家修行的人。但她放不下共过患难的弟弟，放不下有救命之恩相依为命的外公，放不下存活下来的四子三女，很多很多的东西她都放不下。

It was because of the sufferings of the war that grandma became the most devout Buddhist. Grandma was very envious of people who can become a monk or nun. But she could not let go of her brother, who had suffered a lot, and could not let go of my grandpa, who had saved her life,could not let go of the four sons and three daughters. There were too many things she could not leave behind.

“佛教的宗旨虽在解脱生死，出家虽是解脱生死的最佳途径，但是，出了家的如不实修或修不得法，未必能够解脱生死，不出家的，如能修持，也未必不能解脱生死。”我的师傅肖师太就曾经这样劝说过外婆。她是我外婆的莫逆之交。

"Although the purpose of Buddhism is to liberate life and death, and being a monk is the best way to get rid of life and death. But it may not be possible to be free from life and death if the practice is not actually done or rightly performed, and if it can be practiced well in the mundane world, it may also liberate people from life and death. " , that's what my master Xiao shitai used to say to my grandmother. She's my grandma's best friend.

所以，外婆终其一生，也没有能够走进佛教的大门，看看那个没有战争、没有生死的理想世界。但她真的一直在南岳七十二峰的各个寺庙里诚心膜拜，为亲人们祈祷，希望佛祖菩萨药师佛无量佛等等保佑她心中所有的亲人。

Therefore, in all her life, grandma had never been able to walk into the gate of Buddhism, to see the ideal world without war and death. But she did worship in the temples of the seventy-two peaks of Nanyue, praying for her loved ones, praying that Buddha and Bodhisattva, and so on bless all the relatives in her heart.

我常常为外婆的这种精神感动。假如诺贝尔和平奖可以颁发给普通老百姓的话，外婆绝对有资格领取。因为她是我知道的最盼望世界和平的铁杆发烧友。

I'm always so moved by my grandmother's spirit. If the Nobel Peace Prize could be awarded to ordinary people, grandma would be absolutely eligible for it. Because she's the biggest fan of world peace I've ever known.

外婆去世的时候，我写了一首长长的自由诗。将近一个小时的时间里，我跪在外婆的灵柩前，捧着纸张，边朗诵边哭，直至嗓声嘶哑，最后发不出声音，说不出话来。我实在是太伤心了！

When grandma died, I wrote a long free poem. For nearly an hour, I knelt in front of my grandmother's coffin, holding the paper, reading aloud and crying until my voice was hoarse, and I could not speak. I am so, so sad!

悲哀像是一条紧紧勒住了我脖子的麻绳，在外婆去世后的几年里，只要我一想起外婆，就让我眼里盈满了泪水，无声地流下脸颊。没有外婆当初的慈悲，我可能一出生就离开了这个世界。外婆也是我的救命恩人。

Sorrow is like a rope that tightly binds my neck, and in the years after grandma's death, whenever I thought of my grandmother, tears would fill my eyes and streamed noiselessly down my cheeks. Without grandma's mercy, I might have left the world at birth. Grandma was my savior, too.

外婆和外公去世后几年，我终于找到衡阳城里的画家，根据外婆和外公生前小小的黑白照片，重新画了像，框在镜框里，悬挂在我家客厅的墙壁上。几十年下来，搬了几次家，但在每一次搬家后，客厅里墙壁上悬挂的，始终都是他们的画像.........他们永远陪伴着我！

A few years after grandma and grandpa died, I finally found a painter in Hengyang, who based on a small black-and-white photograph of my grandma and grandpa, repainted two portraits. I framed the portraits and hung on the wall of my living room. In the past decades, i have moved a few times, but after each move, their portraits would always be hung on the walls of the living room ...... They would always be with me!

外婆，我愿意生生世世都做您的外孙！

Grandma, I am willing to be your grandson generation after generations.

作者简介(Author's introduction)：

斧子，中国人民公安大学研究生，湖南省作家协会会员，红网小说版特约评论员，出版著作有：

Axe, graduate student from Chinese People's Public Security University, member of the Hunan Writers'Association and a special commentator of the Red Net fiction section, published:

散文诗集《等你归来》，湖南文艺出版社；

Prose poetry collection "Waiting for you" , Hunan Literature and Art Publishing House;

散文诗集《欠债校长》，香港商务印书馆；

Prose poetry collection "Principal in debt",  The Hong Kong commercial press (HKPC);

中短篇小说集《月下天鹅和祝塘的绝版爱情》，团结出版社；

A short and medium story collection, "The last edition of love between the swan under the month and Zhu Tang", United publishing house;

中短篇小说集《隐身保镖》，团结出版社；

A short and medium story collection, "Invisible bodyguard", United publishing house;

中短篇小说集《财哥的第一次婚姻》，中国文联出版社......

A short and medium story collection, "The first marriage of brother Qian," and published by the China Federation of Literary Unions ...