以下为我在3月5日头马星火俱乐部的CC4备稿英文演讲。内容节选自<Grit坚毅>一书中精读的<Passion>这个部分。坚毅的养成有四个不可分割的部分:热爱、刻意练习、意义以及百折不挠的希望,打算借助头马的进阶体系把他们一一讲述出来。以下为我的演讲辞及中文翻译。希望尽可能多的渴望成功的人,为人父母的人能够看到并从中受益。
I have a son, who is 2.5 years old. I was warned for long about the phenomenon of terrible 2 and horrible 3. By which I could expect how much trouble this little creature could bring to me at this age. I thought I am ready for that day’s coming, but in fact I AM NOT: The home is all the time messy and chaotic as long as he wakes up. He is simply curious about everything, trying to touch whatever is forbidden for him to touch, spilling the water here and there, hiding things to places we can hardly find, drawing on whitewalls, and crawling up the chairs to reach for whatever is not reachable…Sometimes I am totally upset and even get angry until one day I read the story about Jeff and his mom Jackie.
我有一个两岁半的儿子。很早就被警告过“可怕的2岁,恐怖的3岁”这样的自然发展现象。我觉得自己已经充分准备好了,能预期到这个小家伙到2岁的时候会给我带来多少麻烦。但事实上,我并没有准备好!从他每天起床开始,整个房子一整天都是乱七八糟、喧闹无比,他几乎对任何事都感兴趣:总是试图去摸他不能摸的东西,到处洒水玩儿,把东西藏在谁都找不到的地方,在白白的墙壁上画画……我时不时得被他弄得很沮丧,有时候甚至很生气,直到有一天我读到了关于Jeff和他的妈妈Jackie的故事。
Jeff was born when Jackie was only seventeen. The following years she gave birth to to two more kids. As such a young mom, she had barely any experience with kids and nobody told her what to do. She simply followed her instinct. Jackie recalled: “I was just so curious about these little creatures and who they were and what they were going to do. I paid attention to what interested each one—they were all different. Simply put it-I followed their lead. Their interest, their passion, guided me. I felt it was my responsibility to let them do deep dives into what they enjoyed.
Jeff出生的时候,Jackie才17岁。接下来几年她又生了两个孩子。作为这么年轻的妈妈,Jackie几乎没有任何养育孩子的经验,没人告诉她怎么做个妈妈。她仅仅是听从了她的本能。她回忆说:“我对这些小家伙就是充满了好奇心,他们到底是谁?他们要做什么?我对他们感兴趣事情给予关注,他们每个人的兴趣,因为他们各个与众不同!我仅仅听从了他们所热爱和感兴趣的事情而已。我觉得自己有责任让他们在自己感兴趣的领域深度畅游。
At three, Jeff asked many times to sleep in a big bed like mom does. Jackie explained that eventually he would sleep in a big bed, but not yet. However the next day while she was walking into his room, she was amazed to find that Jeff was using screwdriver to tear his crib apart. I would wonder what you would do if you were Jackie? Jackie didn’t blame him. Instead, she sat on the floor and helped Jeff with it. That night, Jeff slept in a big bed.
Jeff三岁时,多次要求睡在大床上,而不是婴儿床里。Jackie跟他解释说他最终一定是睡在大床上的,但不是现在,还不到时候。然而,当第二天Jackie走进Jeff房间里时,她惊讶地发现,自己的3岁宝贝正用改锥拆婴儿床呢!我很好奇大家遇到这种情况会如何行事?Jackie是这样做的:她没有责备Jeff,相反,她坐在地上,帮助Jeff一起拆床!当天晚上,Jeff就睡在了大床上。
By middle school, it seems like Jeff turned even naughtier. He invented an alarm clock and each time when his younger brother or sister came into his room without his permission the alarm went off with annoying buzzing sound. In another case, he used string and tied all the handles of the kitchen cupboards together, and then, when Jackie opened one, all of them would pop open. When I read about this, I tried to picture myself in these situations. I tried to picture not freaking out. I tried to imagine doing what Jackie did. She simply watched them happen and smiled in belief that Jeff was on his way of becoming a world-class problem solver and then happily nurtured that interest.
到了中学,似乎Jeff更加淘气了。他发明了一个警报系统,每次他的弟弟或妹妹未经允许进入他的房间,警报系统就会发出恼人的蜂鸣。另外一次,他用一根线,把厨房里的橱柜把手全部绑在了一起,当Jackie开其中一个橱柜门时,全部橱柜都会突然打开!当我读到这里时,我试图想象我自己身临其境,想象我自己没有被吓到,想象自己做Jackie所做的事情:她只是静静在一边观察着,面带微笑,内心坚信自己的孩子Jeff正走在世界级问题解决大师的路上了。
One day Jeff decided to build an infinity cube. When Jackie was sitting on the sidewalk and chatting with her friend. Jeff came up to them and was telling them all the science behind it. It sounded complicated enough. Jackie listened carefully and nodded her head and asked a question every once in a while. Her friend looked puzzled and when Jeff was away, she couldn’t help asking whether Jackie truly knew what Jeff was talking about. Here is what she said: It’s not important that I understand everything. It’s important that I listen.
一天,Jeff要自制一个万花筒。当时Jackie和她的一位朋友正坐在路边聊天。Jeff走上前去,向她们解释万花筒背后复杂的科学原理。Jackie非常专注地听着,时不时点头,问个问题。她的朋友看呆了,当Jeff离开时,这个朋友迫不及待地问Jackie"你真的懂Jeff说的是什么么?Jackie是这样说的:我是否明白他说的是什么并不重要,重要的是我在倾听。
By high school, Jeff had turned the family garage into a lab for experiments and inventing things. One day, Jackie got a call from Jeff’s school saying that he was skipping classes after lunch. Instead of getting mad, Jackie asked him where he’d been going in the afternoons in a peaceful manner. Jeff told her he’d found a local professor who was letting him experiment with airplane wings and friction and drag and---Okey, Okey, Jackie said, I got it. Now let’s figure out a legal way to do that. It's a kind of permission, isn't it?
到了高中时期,Jeff已经把他家的车库变成了自己的实验室,用于做实验和各种发明。一天,Jackie接到学校的电话,说Jeff下午逃学了。Jackie并没有为此生气,而是平静地问Jeff这些天下午去哪儿了。Jeff告诉她他在本地找了一位教授,他允许Jeff用他的机翼,测试摩擦力、阻力......“好了,好了”Jackie打断了Jeff"我明白你的意思了。咱们得研究个合法的方法来做这件事(而不是逃学的方式)“ 这是一种许可,不是么?
In college, Jeff majored in computer science and electrical engineering, in which he could further pursue his passion. And several years later, Jeff quit a highly-paid job and built an online bookstore named after the longest river in the world. As you can see, Jeff is not some random kid. He is the founder of Amazon.com.
在大学,Jeff的专业是计算机和电子工程学。在这些学科里,他可以继续追逐他的热爱。几年以后,他辞去了高薪的工作,建立了一个在线书店,这个书店是以世界上最长的河流命名的。是的,Jeff不是我随便说说的一个孩子,他正是亚马逊的创始人。
That’s the end of the story. I could learn so much from it. As for adults like us, we all know something about passion. With passion, you have a better chance to achieve world-class, international level of greatness or success, or at least some level of success in your field. Without interest or passion, you simply have no chance at all. So quit the job that tortures you. If you truly want to make a difference, do something great, make sure to do what you enjoy doing. From the story parents like me may get to know more about nurturing kids' passion. These final words are for parents, Please remember it’s not about the YOUR passion but about what truly interests your kids. Remember to be curious and always open-minded. And remember to set them free as much as possible so that they could fly high one day!
故事结束了。我可以从中学到很多。作为一个成年人,我们似乎都知道关于”热爱“这件事有多重要:有了热爱的事,你将更有机会取得世界级水平的成功,没有的话,干脆就没有机会。所以如果你的工作正在折磨你,干脆辞掉!如果你真想改变世界,想做些伟大的事情,那么一定确保你正在做你真心热爱的事情!从故事中,我作为一个妈妈,也对如何养育孩子们的热爱和兴趣这方面,领悟颇多。所以,结束语是给父母们的:记住,一切都在于你的孩子热爱什么,而不是你热爱什么,很多父母把两者混淆!记住永远保持一颗像孩子一样的好奇心,保持开放的心态!记住尽可能地给孩子们自由,这样终有一天,他们才会腾空飞翔!