Look Back And Smile

Realizing that I won't get any support to resist the high temperature, I asked myself silently: Leave or stay? If I chose to leave here and move into another accommodation facilitated with air conditioning, it may not cost me extra financially as I don't mind whether it's a house or an apartment. What I want is just a cozy and comfortable room with an acceptable temperature. However, it also means I'd sacrifice the friendship and trust I've built so far with Amy and George. To be honest, I'm not a guy who pays much attention to the so-called “face”, after all, everyone just lives for his own benefits and there's absolutely no need to embarrass myself. After all, when I later start out to other cities where there is no acquaintance at all, I'll have to live under the same roof with strangers, so why not take it as a chance for better transition?

Just life isn't as simple as I think and apart from the goddamned "face", there's also something existing called "feelings". George has helped me so much since he knew I was coming to AU, from university resources to accommodation provision to job searching. If I merely waved my hand saying goodbye to him, it would make myself feel I'm a total asshole or let's say in a softer way, a pain in the ass guy. Gratitude is the last thing I'd give up, so I finally made up my mind to accept everything whatever it takes. 

As long as the emotional knot has been softened, things are becoming easier and it's time to come up with solutions. Going to the library after work to cool off, putting a basin of water in the room to increase moisture or keeping the sun-blind closed to avoid sunshine, whatever involves that would help, I'll have a go. And if I really would like to move to a local family with native speakers, I may look into it after completing the upcoming language test in mid-February and say thank you to George and his family in a honest and sincere way before departure.

Fight for your dream, my lucky Eva! All your efforts towards English will pay off one day and you'd smile back to the past!

Man up, lucky Eva!
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