这篇文章虽然标题写的很烂大街，但是有很多的内容都很戳中实际，比如我们如何处理情绪上的问题，我们如何看待他人，如何正视自己。所以我在看到视频之后就决定抄录下字幕，分享给大家，也希望给大家带来启发～
1.
You realise that most of the bad behaviour of other people really comes down to fear and anxiety. Rather than, as it's generally easier to presume, nastiness or idiocy. You loosen your hold on self-righteousness and stop thinking of the world as populated by monsters or fools. It makes things less black and white at first, but in time, a great deal more interesting.
你意识到，他人不好的行为其实大多是出于恐惧和焦虑，并不是因为内心龌龊，或是白痴愚蠢。你原来想当然地那样认为，其实是不对的。你不再自以为是地觉得在这个世界上到处都是怪物或傻瓜。虽然事情不再非黑即白，但是随着时间的流逝，这个世界变得更有趣了。
2.
You learn, that what is in your head can't automatically be understood by other people. You realise that, unfortunately, you going to have articulate your intentions and feelings with the use of words and can't fairly blame other people, for not getting what you mean until you've spoken calmly and clearly.
你发现，其他人并不能自然而然地读懂你心中所想。因此，你意识到你必须要用语言有力地表达自己的意图和感受。你必须冷静、清晰地向别人解释，否则你不能责怪别人听不懂你的想法。
3.
You learn that remarkably you do sometimes get things wrong. With huge courage, you take your first faltering steps towards, once in a while, apologising.
你终于意识到自己难免也会犯错。尽管有时候你支支吾吾、犹犹豫豫的，但你鼓足了勇气，敢于承认自己的错误，向别人道歉。
4.
You learn to be confident not by realising that you're great, but by learning that everyone else is just stupid, scared and lost as you are. We're all making it up as we go along, and that's fine.
你开始变得充满自信。不是因为自己有多么优秀，而是因为你发现，其实身边的人和你一样愚蠢、胆小和迷茫。一步一步走下去，我们都会成功的。所以，不要太介意这些。
5.
You forgive your parents, because you realise that they didn’t put you on this earth in order to insult you. They were just painfully out of their depth and struggling with demons of their own. Anger turns, at points, to pity and compassion.
你开始体谅自己的父母，因为你意识到父母不是为了辱骂你，才把你带到这个世界来的。他们也在和自己内心的邪恶小人艰难地斗争。所以他们有时候愤怒，有时候充满了怜悯和同情。
6.
You learn that enormous influence of so called 'small' things on mood: bed-times, blood sugar and alcohol levels, degrees of background stress and so on. And as a result, you learn never to bring up an important, contentious issue with a loved one until everyone is well rested, no one is drunk, you've had some food, nothing else is alarming you and you aren't rushing to catch a train.
你发现，情绪上的这些“小东西”，比如有没有休息好，血糖高不高，有没有喝醉，是不是倍感压力等，都有着巨大的“杀伤力”。所以，你和你爱的人要在都精力充沛、头脑清醒、吃饱喝足、心情气和，也不急着去赶火车的前提下才能好好谈那些富有争议的话题。
7.
You give up sulking. If someone hurts you, you don't store up the hatred and the hurt for days. You remember you'll be dead soon. You don’t expect others to know what's wrong. You tell them straight, and if they get it, you forgive them. And if they don’t, in a different way, you forgive them too.
你不再生闷气。如果有人伤害了你，你不会只是忍气吞声、积攒怒火。人终有一死，你不必指望别人意识到自己的错误。所以，不如打开天窗说亮话，如果他们能明白，那就原谅他们。如果他们不明白，那就换种方式原谅他们。
8.
You cease to believe in perfection in pretty much, every area. There aren't perfect people, perfect jobs, or perfect lives. Instead, you pivot towards an appreciation of what is to use the psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott's exemplary phrase 'good enough'. You realise that many things in your life are at once quiet frustrating and yet, in many ways, eminently good enough.
你不再执着于事事完美。这世上没有完美的人，没有完美的工作，更没有完美的人生。相反，你非常赞赏心理学大师唐纳德·温尼克特的经典语录“足够好了，及时行乐”。你发现从前那些令你非常沮丧的事情，换个角度重新看看，其实已经足够好了。
9.
You learn the virtues of being a little more pessimistic about how things will turn out and as a result ,emerge as a calmer ,more patient and more forgiving soul. You lose some of your idealism and become a far less maddening person.
你意识到应该降低一点期望值。对万事抱有一种稍微悲观的态度，这样可以是你变得更冷静、更有耐心、更宽容。你丢掉一部分理想主义，变得不那么歇斯底里。
10.
You learn to see that everyone's weaknesses of character are linked to counter-balancing strengths. Rather than isolating their weaknesses, you look at the whole picture. Yes, someone is rather than pedantic, but they also beautifully precise and a rock at times of turmoil. Yes someone is a bit messy, but at the same time brilliantly creative and very visionary. You realise, truly realise, that perfect people don’t exist, and every strength will be tagged to a weakness.
你开始懂得每个人既有优点，也有缺点，就像天平的两端一样。所以你要懂得用全面的眼光去看待别人。有的人固执迂腐，但同时一丝不苟，哪怕是块石头，偶尔也会晃动。还有的人不拘小节，但他们也常常独辟蹊径，具有远见。你发自内心地意识到，人无完人，强与弱之间一定存在着一种平衡。
11.
You fall in love a bit less easily. It's difficult, in a way. When you were less mature, you could develop a crush in an instant. Now, you're poignantly aware that everyone, however externally charming or accomplished, would be a bit of pain from close up. You develop loyalty to what you already have.
你不再轻言说爱，这一点其实很难做到。如果你还不够成熟，你很容易对他人一见钟情。但现在，你开始渐渐意识到，有些人只是金玉其外，败絮其中。你忠于自己所拥有的一切。
12.
You learn that you are rather surprisingly quiet a difficult person to live with. You share some of you earlier sentimentality toward yourself. You go into friendships and relationships offering others kindly warnings of how and when you might prove a challenge.
你惊奇地发现，有时自己是一个很难相处的人。当结识新朋友或者开启新感情的时候，你会和他们分享自己从前多么感情用事、不计后果，你会善意地提醒他们，在什么时候和什么情境下，你会变得特别难对付。
13.
You learn to forgive yourself for your errors and foolishness. You realise the unfruitful self-absorption involved in simply flogging yourself for past mistakes. You become more of a friend to yourself. Of course you're an idiot, but you're still a loveable one, as we all are.
你能够正视自己的错误和愚蠢。你意识到沉溺、纠结于过去的错误之中是无意义的，那只会让自己止步不前。现在，你更像是自己的知心朋友。你确实挺傻的，不过傻得可爱，我们大家都一样。
14.
You learn that part of what maturity involves is making peace, with the stubbornly child-like bits of you that will always remain. You cease trying to be a grown up at every occasion. You accept that we all have our regressive moments and when the inner two years old you, raises its head, you greet them generously and give them that attention they need.
你发现，真正的成熟其实保留着一部分孩子气。你不需要事事都做个成年人，我们每个人都会时不时地像孩子一样。你发现做回两岁的自己也挺好的，你悦纳这样的自我，也用心呵护这样的自我。
15.
You cease to put too much hope in grant plans for the kind of happiness you expect can last for years. You start to celebrate the little things that go well. You realise that satisfaction comes in increments of minutes. You're delighted if one day passes by without too much bother. You take greater interest in flowers and in evening sky. You develope a taste for small pleasures. 你不再执着于树立远大的目标，它太过缥缈，很难实现。你开始为自己取的的小成绩而欢欣鼓舞。你发现，时间才是治愈一切的最好的良药。你喜欢这种平淡无奇、波澜不惊的岁月
你为花朵和夜空着迷，享受着小小的快乐。
16.
What people in general thinks of you ceases to be such a concern. You realise that the minds of others are muddled places and you don’t try so hard to polish your image in everyone else's eyes. What counts is that you and one or two others are OK with you being you. You giving up on fame and start to rely on love.
你完全不在乎别人怎样看待你，你意识到别人心，海底针，所以没必要在每个人面前都拼命示好。有三两好友能读懂你就足够了。你不再追逐名利，而是开始追求爱。
17.
You get better at hearing feedback. Rather than assuming that anyone who criticises you is either trying to humiliate you or is making a mistake, you accept that maybe it could be an idea to take a few things on board. You start to see that you can listen to criticism and survive it without having to put on your armour and deny there was ever a problem.
你比以前更能听取别人的意见，别人的批评其实并不是羞辱你的话语，也不是无稽之谈。你认真聆听，因为这些批评，说不准会有些帮助。你不再身披铠甲，自行其是，对这些批评置之不理。你试着去接受它们，从中进步。
18.
You realise the extend to which you tend to live, day by day, in too great proximity to certain of your problems and issues. You remember more and more that you need to get out and get a perspective on the things that pain you. You take more walks in nature, you might get a pet, they don’t fret like we do and you appreciate the distant galaxies above us in the night sky.
你发现，在漫长的生命洪流中，层出不穷的问题和麻烦总是和我们如影随形。所以你意识到要想办法摆脱它们，或者换个角度来看待问题。你变得更喜欢在自然中散步，你可能还会带上一只宠物，它们看上去总是无忧无虑的。你也喜欢凝望头顶遥远的星河，浩瀚的宇宙。
19.
You recognise how your distinctive past colours your response to events and learn to compensate for the distortions that can result. You accept, that because of how your childhood went, you have a predisposition to exaggerate in certain areas. You become suspicious of your own first impulses around particular topics. You realise, sometimes, not to go with your first feelings.
你发现，过去独特的经历影响着你对万事万物的态度。你学会了怎样弥补歪曲事实带来的不良后果，因为你发现在孩童时代，你就总是喜欢夸大某些事实。所以你开始怀疑自己的冲动有时候是不正确的，所以你意识到，不能意气用事。
20.
When you start a friendship, you realise that other people don’t principally want to know your good news, so much as gain an insight into what troubles and worries you, so that they can, in turn, feel less lonely with the pains of their own hearts. You become a better friend. Because you see that what friendship is really about is a sharing of vulnerability.
当你结交了新朋友，你发现有些人好像并不那么在乎你好的方面，反而更想了解你的麻烦和忧虑。因为这样他们就会觉得自己并不孤单，原来有人和自己一样痛苦。你明白了真正的友谊是什么样子的，朋友之间应该坦诚地分享彼此的脆弱。所以你成了一个更好的朋友。
