WHAT IS DISCIPLINE?

Discipline primarily relates to instruction, education, and correction. It is never connected with abuse or cruelty.

LOVING DISCIPLINE

Granted, it is not possible for parents to have fully perfect example of self-control. Sometimes your patience will be stretched to the limit, but during the particularly difficult times, always remember that anger-based punishment is usually oppressive, excessive, and counterproductive. Furthermore, punishment motivated by anger or frustration is not discipline at all. It is simply a loss of self-control.

On the other hand, when you discipline with love and self-control, you are likely to get better results.

REASONABLE DISCIPLINE

Reasonable parents are mindful that children are not miniature adults.Tried to take into account her age and degree of maturity.”

It is vital that you be realistic in your expectations and, at the same time, not justify or condone wrong conduct or attitudes. By taking into account your child’s abilities, limitations, and other circumstances, you will ensure that your discipline is balanced and reasonable.

CONSISTENT DISCIPLINE

Children  need the security of consistent discipline. If your standards change depending on your mood, your child may become confused and frustrated.

“Let your word ‘Yes’ mean yes, your ‘No,’ no.” Those words well apply to parenting. Think carefully before giving ultimatums you have no intention of carrying out. If you warn your child that a certain form of discipline will result if he misbehaves, be sure to follow through.

Good parental communication is essential to consistent discipline. If parents disagree about how to handle a situation, it is best that they discuss those differences privately and reach a united decision.

DISCIPLINE IS ESSENTIAL

If you give your children loving, reasonable, and consistent discipline, you can be certain that your efforts will benefit your children. Your loving direction may help your children to develop into mature, responsible, and balanced adults.

应该怎样管教孩子？

管教是什么意思

管教”不完全是惩罚的意思。这个词主要是指“指导、教育、纠正”，绝对没有虐待的含意。

管教儿女好比栽花种树。栽种植物的人必须翻土、浇水、施肥，也要除虫、除草。植物成长期间，也许还要不时修剪枝叶，免得植物长歪。要植物长得好，牵涉到的工作确实很多。类似地，养育儿女牵涉到很多不同方面，有时也包括施行管教。管教就像修剪枝叶，能尽早纠正孩子的错误倾向，防止孩子走歪路。可是，正如修剪植物必须有技巧，否则可能会令植物枯萎，管教儿女也必须运用适当的技巧，并怀着爱心去施行。

管教要以爱为本

父母不可能在表现自制方面做得十全十美。有时候孩子所做的事，也许令你觉得忍无可忍。但要记得，在盛怒之下惩罚孩子，很容易会罚得太重、太多，并造成反效果。再说，在盛怒下惩罚孩子其实不算管教，只是失去自制的表现。

相反，如果你能保持克制，而且在管教孩子时，让孩子感受到你对他的爱，你施行的管教就会收到更好的效果。

管教要合情合理

父母有合理的态度，就会提醒自己，孩子毕竟是孩子。有一个方法可以帮助我对事情有正确的看法，不致反应过激，那就是想想自己小时候是怎么样的。”

你对孩子的要求必须合乎现实，但也不要纵容错误的行为和态度。施行管教时，要考虑孩子的情况和能力限度。这样，你的管教就能做到合情合理、轻重适中。

管教要说到做到

父母的管教首尾一贯，孩子才会有安全感。如果你心情好就放松标准，心情不好就管得很严，孩子就会感到沮丧和无所适从。“你们的话，是就该说‘是’，不是就该说‘不是’”。如果你打算向孩子发出“最后通牒”，警告他要是继续不听话就会受到某种惩罚，就要在说之前先想清楚你是否真的做得到。一旦说了出来，就要说到做到。

父母之间必须有良好的沟通，管教孩子的方法才会一致。如果在某些事上，夫妻有不同的意见，最好是私下商量，设法达成共识。

管教是必须的

如果你管教孩子以爱为本，合情合理，并且说到做到，你的管教就一定会有成效。你的孩子很可能会成为一个成熟、可靠，处事平衡合理的人。