咏鹅
唐·骆宾王
鹅,鹅,鹅,曲项向天歌。
白毛浮绿水,红掌拨清波。
直译版:
Ode to Geese
By Luo Binwang
Geese, geese, geese!
With neck curved, you sing to the sky.
With white feathers, you float on the green water;
With red feet, you paddle the clear waves.
标准版:
O Geese
by Luo Binwang,Translated by Xu Yuanchong
O geese, O geese, O geese!
You crane your neck and sing to sky your song sweet.
Your white feathers float on green water with ease.
You swim through clear waters with your red-webbed feet.
赏析:1.从意思表达的准确性来看,前后两个版本均能表达诗的内容,是为信;
2.从情感的抒发方面来看,标准版明显更为丰富,将咏鹅翻译为“O Geese”——鹅啊,开头的赞叹及第二人称的表达让人从英文中依然能感受作者写下古诗时的感受,是为达;
3.从英文的句式来看,两篇翻译局势均较为统一,用一致的句式表现古诗的格律,标准版则在此基础上保证了古诗的韵脚,1、3句的“geese”、“ease”,2、4句的“sweet”、“feet”使得英文的翻译能够像古诗一样具有平仄和韵律,是为雅;