Male students pursuing doctorate degrees in China are facing the unfortunate trade-off of becoming “leftovers” in the marriage market due to extended education that shrinks their social circle and leaves them broke.
在中国,许多攻读博士学位的学生正面临着这样的不幸境况,他们学业得意却情场失意,成为“剩男”者比比皆是。这是因为学业深造缩小了他们的社交圈子,经济情况也不乐观。
The plight of male doctorate students in the country has been the subject of public discussion following reports on a 30-year-old Ph.D. student who fell victim to a woman he met online, the Global Times noted.
环球时报曾报道了三十岁博士男网恋受骗的事件,这如一石激起千层浪,该国博士男的窘况成为了公众热议的话题。
As far as the story goes, the male student, pressured by his family to marry already, was swindled out of over 7,000 yuan (roughly $1,040) by the woman who apparently lured him only for money.
故事内容是这样的,博士男不堪家庭催婚的压力和一位女士相亲结婚,最后被骗了7000多元(约合1040美元),显然这位女士就是冲着钱才去勾引他的。
China’s male doctorate students, however, are not oblivious to the prospect of staying single for the rest of their lives, perhaps even aware of boys so much younger than they are but already in relationships.
可情况是残酷的,中国的博士男们意识到,他们孤独余生的可能性如芒在背,而那些比他们年多的男性却已找到了另一半。
A primary disadvantage they perceive is their current economic status, which, understandably, would not be the best considering that their studies delay them from maximizing opportunities in the job market.
他们认为其经济现状是他们最大的短板,这种情况不难理解,因为学业是他们的优先选择,推迟了职场上最大化的发展机遇。
Ph.D. student John Fang, 29, recalled the demand of his ex-girlfriend’s mother:
John Fang博士今年29岁,他说起了他前女友的妈妈提出的要求:
“She told me several times that I need to have an economic basis for the new family and that a place of our own is a must.”
“她不止一次的对我说,你要有一定的经济基础才能组建新家庭,而且房子是刚需,缺不得的。”
But Fang’s limited income made even the idea of a house loan practically impossible. He wanted to put the wedding on hold until he graduates and secures employment, but the wait was simply too long for his partner.
但小方的收入十分有限,甚至达不到申请房贷的基本要求。他想等到毕业后,工作有了保证再举行婚礼,可这对于他的女友来说实在是过于漫长了。
Another disadvantage the students find is their own preference for a “spiritual match,” which basically echoes their desire for a much deeper relationship that requires cautiousness on their part.
他们还发现了一个缺点,即他们倾向于“精神契合”的恋爱。这恰恰说明了他们渴望更深层的情感关系,而这是需要他们审慎交友,费心费力的。
“As your horizon has been widened and you have a more insightful vision of the world, you are more willing to find a real soul mate and less likely to make any compromise in a spiritual match. I think that’s one of the reasons that many doctoral students remain single,” said Wang, another doctorate student.
另一位博士生小王说:“因为你见多识广,对这个世界有更深刻的见解,所以你会更希望找到一个灵魂伴侣,不愿意在精神上的匹配中有任何的妥协。我想这也是许多博士男保持单身的一个原因吧。”
Finally, students have noted the idea of a “watershed effect,” which results from the small social circle they associate with. One who identified as “Liu Qi” pointed:
最后他们指出,他们所处的小型社交圈产生了一种“分水岭效应”。一个名叫“Liu Qi”的学生解释道:
“The dividing line is when you step into a doctoral program. It’s a like a watershed and you’d better have a stable relationship before that. If not, you are most likely going to be leftover.”
“博士阶段就是那条分界线。它起到了分水岭的作用,你最好有了一个稳定的情感关系之后再攻读博士。否则,你很可能会踏入单身汉的行列了。”
Liu explained that male doctorate students can only find love in two channels: at school or in blind dates. Sadly, female doctorate students are often few, of which many are already off-limits. Those in blind dates, on the other hand, tend to be employed women with more social experience, which puts male doctorate students at an “embarrassing” position.
小刘解释说,博士男们要想找到另一半只有两种方式,在学校恋爱或者相亲。可不幸的是,通常情况下,博士女数量很少,而且她们中大多都已结婚了。而参加相亲的女性多是职场人士,有着丰富的社会经验,和她们相亲的话博士男们往往会陷入“尴尬”的境地。
Male doctorate students are in a bit of bind, but the phenomena may be also extending from economic and social factors within their reach. It must be noted that China has the most imbalanced gender ratio in the world, which, to be presumptive, trims their chances of finding the one even more.
博士男们的情感情况不容乐观,可一旦他们有了一定的经济基础和社会地位,这个问题就会迎刃而解。然而有一点必须指出,中国是这个世界上男女比例极不平衡的国家,可以推定,他们的寻爱之路困难重重,机会渺茫。