Today, psychologist Tracey posted a video on Bilibili that caught my interest — how to identify and name your emotions.
To identify and name our emotions, there are five steps.
The first step is to engage mindful observation (正念观察）. When we have a strong reaction to something, bring ourselves into a state of mindfulness, where you are actively observing our thoughts, feelings, and body sensations without judgment. Think of our thoughts as metacognition, it is very important step, it can help us not only present at moment, but also to develop self awareness. Not to try analyze anything, just observe. We can do a brief mindfulness exercise — sit comfortably, close our eyes and focus on your breath. Observe our thoughts without trying to control or judge them. If our mind wanders, gently bring it back to our breath.
The second step is to identify our thoughts and body sensations. Did our heart racing, do we feel lump in our throat, are our thoughts negative or positive. If we have a chance to write it down, write down these thoughts and body sensations.
Step three is to name the emotions. It could be happiness, sadness, anger, fear, surprise or disgust. We might also feel more complex emotions, like shame, guilt, relief, anticipation.
Step four is to keep emotional journal.As an exercise, keep emotional journal for a week, know any mode. For example, someone often feel anxious when he have a lot do. Or someone feel happy when he take time for self-care.
Step five is to respond to the emotions. Some emotions need to be expressed, others might be signs that something in our life needs to change, and others still might just need to be acknowledged and allowed to pass. As an exercise, the next time we know strong emotion, try responding in a new way. If angry, instead of yelling, try taking deep breaths for a few cycles in and out. If sad, instead of isolating ourselves, reach out to a friend.
Don’t worry if we can’t always identify our emotions or if we sometimes react in ways wish we hadn’t. We’re learning and growing, and sustained change takes time.
