The girl who I just met on the Internet told me that she was going to tell me something serious. She asked me to accept her no matter what.
We have been having a great time sharing our thoughts in the last couple of days. I was pretty worried that some bad things happened to her. Does she grow up without a father/mother? Does she have serious diseases which will greatly shorten her life expectancy or make her infertile? I replied to her as much as I could.
It turned out that she was not able to pass the CET4 English test. Twice. I thought it was a bit funny that she was worried about not being accepted, by me, a completely random stranger on the Internet.
It just got me thinking why it is shameful to admit not passing a test twice to someone just met on the Internet. But then I realized that it was exactly the same mistake I made a lot of times. Being pretty bad academically, I can't help but feeling inferior to others in the college.
This idea has been haunted me for a very long time. I am still afraid of coming across acquaintance in the campus and being asked how I have been doing recently. Yes I do not graduate in time. I have been ashamed of myself for this particular reason.
There isn't much difference between me and this girl. We are both not able to accept ourselves that we are afraid of not being accepted by others.
