Today I have some new ideas.
Last night I red news on my phone. I found alibaba was review by CSRC because credit limit which it give its customers and I am afraid that my credit limit will be decreased. If it is happening, I cannot pay out my debt and I will be obliged to ask my mother's help. But I don't want my mother know this thing. My fear prevented me from concentrating on my study this morning.

Reading book can prevent me from fear, so I spent my whole afternoon in reading "Luo Tuo Xiang Zi" . I feel Xiang Zi's tough experience and pain in his heart. I feel I can understand his difficult when he had no enough money to buy a new car which is his dream and his tool to keep life. He was far from his dream because he was a common person in the hard society. He had no skills but a strong body. He had to rely on his body and strength to earn a little money, which made him tired everyday. Although he was so hardworking and diligent, he took three years to save enough money to buy a new car, and before long his own car was robbed by soldiers. He had to start saving money again and this experience broke his spirit and confidence. He fear something like this incident will happen again and he think he feel he has no bright future. From that, he cannot concentrate on work and was on the verge of all, like bibulosity.
If somebody say that he has some mistake, such as a false purpose in life, where does he go wrong? And what is right? What caused his suffering?