日常 Diary

1.

随着岁数增长，

说错话几率开始上升。

其中较为严重的两个错误是:

第一，俩孩子名字说反。

第二，冰箱和洗衣机说反。

重度怀疑冰箱和洗衣机这俩哥们儿上辈子是一个妈生的。

As I grow older,

the probability of mixing up names is starting to increase.

The two most evident errors are:

1.Mix up the names of the two kids.

2. Mix up refrigerator and washing machine.

I suspect that the refrigerator and washing machine were twins born by the same mother in their previous round of life.

2.

收拾客厅，

看电扇还大摇大摆戳在那里占地方很碍眼。

我:冬天电扇还搁这里？

孩爸:怎么了？它搁那里很丑么？

想说很丑，

最后还是咽下去了，

第一，怕他说:夏天你咋不说丑？我无以为应。

第二，怕他真要把它拆了收起来，

过程中让我负责擦的部分。

Cleaning up the living room,

I saw the electric fan still stood there, taking up a lot of space, a real eyesore.

Me: Why is the electric fan still in living room in winter?

He: Is it ugly to be there?

I wanted to say it's ugly but swallowed it,

Since if I said ugly,

he might say, "Why didn’t you say it's ugly in summer?"? I don’t know how to reply.

Besides, I am afraid if he dismantled it and store,

It would be my responsible part to wipe it. 

3.

我跟我妈聊天，

有时候会像灵魂深处闹暴动。

我:妈，这是我写的日记。

她:你以后别往家族群里发了，太琐碎。

我:你要允许别人有特色。

她:没人同意你。

我:有人同意你？

她:大家因为喜欢你，忍着你。

我:她们不同意，平白无故就喜欢我？

。。。

我女儿写了首诗：

爱

爱像，

大象那么大，

小溪那么长，

金子那么难买，

手电筒那么亮。

写得不错，

但我内心还是会立马给出评价：

要拓展你的视野和世界观啊。

有其母必有其女

Chatting with my mom,

is sometimes like a riot in the depths of the soul.

Me: Mom, this is the diary I wrote.

She: Don't post it in the family chat group anymore, it's too trivial.

Me: You should allow everyone to have their own uniqueness, no one listens to me talking about the Restoration of Israel.

She: No one agrees with you.

Me: Does anyone agree with you then?

She: Everyone endures you there because they like you.

Me: They don't agree with me and just like me for no reason?

...

My daughter wrote a poem:

Love

Love is,

as big as an elephant,

as long as a stream,

as hard to buy as gold,

as bright as the flashlight.

Well written, but I still give an immediate evaluation in my heart:

go on broadening your horizon and worldview.

Like mother, like daug