我忙于工作。我想要每天花三个小时学习英语，可是我做不到。我没有足够的时间去做这件事。我没有足够的时间去做自己喜爱做和我决定去做的事情。

I'm busy with work. I want to spend three hours a day learning English, but I can't. I don't have enough time to do this. I don’t have enough time to do the things I love to do and the things I decide to do.
因此，我知道，我和“时间自由”之间有一段巨大的距离。如果我想要“时间自由”，我必须要能够自由掌控自己。可是我现在达不到那样的境界。思之再三，我发现，我缺少勇气去做那样的事情。我缺少信心去做那样的事情。

Therefore, I know that there is a huge distance between me and "time freedom". If I want "time freedom," I have to be able to control myself freely. But I can't reach that state now. After thinking about it again and again, I realized that I lacked the courage to do such a thing. I lacked the confidence to do something like that.

对于我来说， 32年足够养成我的一个习惯，那就是，我总是基于别人的安排来做事。我每天需要做的唯一事情就是完成任务，而不是挣钱。那是老板的责任，用不着我考虑。

For me, 32 years is enough time to develop a habit of mine, that is, I always do things based on other people's arrangements. The only thing I need to do every day is complete tasks, not make money. That's the boss's responsibility and I don't need to think about it.

要是有一天，我必须靠亲自挣钱养活自己，我有足够的信心去面对现实吗？我不能想象。我发现，我不过是一个工作者而已，我不是生产者，我不是创作者。我正严重依赖于这个社会，离开了这个社会我尚不能很好独自生存。太可怕了！

If one day I have to earn money to support myself, will I have enough confidence to face the reality? I can't imagine. I discovered that I am just a worker, not a producer or a creator. I am heavily dependent on this society, and I cannot survive alone without this society. Terrible!