【译】TED—Want to be happy? Be grateful

There is something you know about me, something very personal, and there is something I know about every one of you and that's very central to your concerns. There is something that we know about everyone we meet anywhere in the world, on the street, that is the very mainspring of whatever they do and whatever they put up with, and that is that all of us want to be happy. In this, we are all together. How we imagine our happiness, that differs from one another, but it's already a lot that we have all in common, that we want to be happy.

你们可能对我有些了解,了解的可能完全是我个人的事。但是我知道各位在乎的最重要的事。我们在世界上任何地方遇到的任何人,无论他们为了什么而做事,无论他们在忍受什么,我们想要的都是,快乐。在这一点上,我们都一样。每个人对于幸福的理解都有所不同,但是我们都想快乐,在这一点上我们是如此的一致。

Now my topic is gratefulness. How is the connection between happiness and gratefulness? Many people would say, well, that's very easy. When you are happy, you are grateful. But think again. Is it really the happy people that are grateful? We all know quite a number of people who have everything that it would take to be happy, and they are not happy, because they want something else or they want more of the same. And we all know people who have lots of misfortune, misfortune that we ourselves would not want to have, and they are deeply happy. They radiate happiness. You are surprised. Why? Because they are grateful. So it is not happiness that makes us grateful. It's gratefulness that makes us happy. If you think it's happiness that makes you grateful, think again. It's gratefulness that makes you happy.

现在,我们的话题转换到感恩,幸福和感激到底有什么联系呢?很多人都会说,嗯,这很简单。当你很快乐的时候,你就会心怀感激。但是想一想,快乐的人真的会感恩吗?我们知道很多人他们拥有很多物质财富,他们本应该会很快乐,但是他们并不快乐,因为他们想要更多新的物质或者想要更多已经有的东西。同样的我们知道,有些人他们承受了很多不幸的谁都不想遇到的灾难,但他们是发自内心的快乐。他们流露出的幸福,你们会感觉很惊讶。为什么?因为他们心怀感激。所以,不是幸福让我们感恩,而是感恩让我们快乐。如果你觉得幸福让我们感恩,再想想,是感恩让我们快乐啊。

Now, we can ask, what really do we mean by gratefulness? And how does it work? I appeal to your own experience. We all know from experience how it goes. We experience something that's valuable to us. Something is given to us that's valuable to us. And it's really given. These two things have to come together. It has to be something valuable, and it's a real gift. You haven't bought it. You haven't earned it. You haven't traded it in. You haven't worked for it. It's just given to you. And when these two things come together, something that's really valuable to me and I realize it's freely given, then gratefulness spontaneously rises in my heart, happiness spontaneously rises in my heart. That's how gratefulness happens.

现在,我们要问一下,感恩真正的意义是什么?还有它是怎么让我们快乐的?看看你们自己的生活体验,我们就会从中发现感恩是怎么改变我们心情的。我们得到过一些对我们有价值的东西,这些东西是别人给我们的,而且是很有价值的东西,而且是真的别人的赠予。当这两种事情联系在一起时,它真的很有价值,它是真正意义上的礼物。你从未购买它,你从未为赢得它,你从未用什么把它交易到手,你也从未为它而努力工作。他只是作为礼物给你。当这里两个事情放在一起,我觉得这是非常有价值的东西,而且当我意识到这是免费得赠予时,我心中就会油然而生出一种感激,一种幸福。这就是感恩是产生的过程。

Now the key to all this is that we cannot only experience this once in a while. We cannot only have grateful experiences. We can be people who live gratefully. Grateful living, that is the thing. And how can we live gratefully? By experiencing, by becoming aware that every moment is a given moment, as we say. It's a gift. You haven't earned it. You haven't brought it about in any way. You have no way of assuring that there will be another moment given to you, and yet, that's the most valuable thing that can ever be given to us, this moment, with all the opportunity that it contains. If we didn't have this present moment, we wouldn't have any opportunity to do anything or experience anything, and this moment is a gift. It's a given moment, as we say.

然后,重点是我们不能仅仅去体验它。我们不能仅仅有这种感恩的感觉,我们要以一种感恩的心态生活。感恩地生活,这才是重点。那么我们怎么才能心怀感激的生活呢?通过体会,意识到每个时刻都是都是上帝的恩赐。它是一个礼物,你从未得到它,你也从未用任何方法买到它。你根本不能确定还会不会有一个新的时刻会给你,但是,这确实是我们得到的最有价值的东西,此时此刻,它包含的所有的机会。如果我们没有当前的这个时刻,我们就没有任何机会去做和体验任何事情,此时此刻是个礼物。这就是我们所说的上帝赠予我们的时刻。

Now, we say the gift within this gift is really the opportunity. What you are really grateful for is the opportunity, not the thing that is given to you, because if that thing were somewhere else and you didn't have the opportunity to enjoy it, to do something with it, you wouldn't be grateful for it. Opportunity is the gift within every gift, and we have this saying, opportunity knocks only once. Well, think again. Every moment is a new gift, over and over again, and if you miss the opportunity of this moment, another moment is given to us, and another moment. We can avail ourselves of this opportunity, or we can miss it, and if we avail ourselves of the opportunity, it is the key to happiness. Behold the master key to our happiness in our own hands. Moment by moment, we can be grateful for this gift.

现在我们所说的礼物中的恩赐其实是这个机会。我所要感激的是这个机会,而不是给你的某个东西,因为如果这东西在别的地方而且你无法去享受它的乐趣,无法用它来做事,你对它就不会心存感激。机会是每个礼物中的赠与,就像一句谚语,机会只有一次。嗯,想一想,每个时刻都是一个新的礼物,一次又一次的重复,如果你错过了当前这个时刻的机会,又会有一个新的机会赠予我们,然后下一个时刻又会到来。我们可以享受当前的时刻,或许我们会错过它,如果我们好好利用这个机会,这就是得到快乐的钥匙。好好把握这个获得幸福的钥匙。坚持下去,我们就会对这个礼物心存感激。

Does that mean that we can be grateful for everything? Certainly not. We cannot be grateful for violence, for war, for oppression, for exploitation. On the personal level, we cannot be grateful for the loss of a friend, for unfaithfulness, for bereavement. But I didn't say we can be grateful for everything. I said we can be grateful in every given moment for the opportunity, and even when we are confronted with something that is terribly difficult, we can rise to this occasion and respond to the opportunity that is given to us. It isn't as bad as it might seem. Actually, when you look at it and experience it, you find that most of the time, what is given to us is opportunity to enjoy, and we only miss it because we are rushing through life and we are not stopping to see the opportunity.

这意味着我们对什么事情都要心怀感激吗?当然不是。我们不能感激战争,感激压迫,感激剥削。就我而言,我不能感激失去朋友,不能感激背叛,不能感激死亡。但是,我并没有说我们要感激所有的事情。我说的是我们要感激每个给我们机会感受的时刻,就算当我们面对一些非常困难的事情时,我们仍然能够超越这个时刻,把它看作是赠予我们的机会。这些困难并没有看起来那么糟糕。事实上,当我们仔细看看这些困难,认真的体验这些艰苦,你会发现很多时候,苦难是上帝赐予我们享受生命的机会,我失去这些机会就是因为我们急匆匆的生活而没有停下脚步来发现这些机会。

But once in a while, something very difficult is given to us, and when this difficult thing occurs to us, it's a challenge to rise to that opportunity, and we can rise to it by learning something which is sometimes painful. Learning patience, for instance. We have been told that the road to peace is not a sprint, but is more like a marathon. That takes patience. That's difficult. It may be to stand up for your opinion, to stand up for your conviction. That's an opportunity that is given to us. To learn, to suffer, to stand up, all these opportunities are given to us, but they are opportunities, and those who avail themselves of those opportunities are the ones that we admire. They make something out of life. And those who fail get another opportunity. We always get another opportunity. That's the wonderful richness of life.

但是有时候,有些困难的事情是很难让我们接受的,当苦难降临到我们头上时,把握这个机会确实是个挑战,我们要试着从痛苦中学习,例如学习耐心。我们曾说过,通往平和的过程不是百米冲刺而是一场马拉松。这需要耐心,这个过程非常艰难,这需要你坚持自己的观点,坚定自己的信仰。这就是上帝赐予我们的机会,去学习,去忍耐,去坚持。所有这些机会都是恩赐,但是它们仅仅是机会,那些好好把握这些机会的人是真正令人敬佩的。机会来源于生活。如果是我们没能把握好此刻的机会,没关系,我总有下一个机会。看,这就是生活的丰富多彩。

So how can we find a method that will harness this? How can each one of us find a method for living gratefully, not just once in a while being grateful, but moment by moment to be grateful. How can we do it? It's a very simple method. It's so simple that it's actually what we were told as children when we learned to cross the street. Stop. Look. Go. That's all. But how often do we stop? We rush through life. We don't stop. We miss the opportunity because we don't stop. We have to stop. We have to get quiet. And we have to build stop signs into our lives.

所以,我们能找到一个利用这些机会的方法吗?怎么才让我们每个人都能找到一个方法去感恩的生活,不是偶尔感激一下,而是一直一直的感恩。我们怎么才能做到?其实有个很简单的方法,这个方法非常简单,因为当我们还是个孩子,家人教我们过马路的时候,就教给我们了这个方法。停下来,看一看,然后走。就这么多。但是我们多久能停一次脚步呢?我们生活的节奏太紧张了。我们没有停下来。我们错过了这个机会是因为我们我们没有停脚步啊。我们应该学会停止,而且我们应该在生活中建立停下脚步的标志。

When I was in Africa some years ago and then came back, I noticed water. In Africa where I was, I didn't have drinkable water. Every time I turned on the faucet, I was overwhelmed. Every time I clicked on the light, I was so grateful. It made me so happy. But after a while, this wears off. So I put little stickers on the light switch and on the water faucet, and every time I turned it on, water. So leave it up to your own imagination. You can find whatever works best for you, but you need stop signs in your life. And when you stop, then the next thing is to look. You look. You open your eyes. You open your ears. You open your nose. You open all your senses for this wonderful richness that is given to us. There is no end to it, and that is what life is all about, to enjoy, to enjoy what is given to us.

我几年前去了非洲,当我回来的时候,我才意识到了水。因为我在非洲待的地方,并没有能喝的水。每当我打开水龙头,我就会受宠若惊。每当我点开灯,我就会很感激。这让我非常快乐。但是过了一段时间,这感觉就会变淡。所以我我就在点灯开关和水龙头上贴上小便签,而且每当我打开水龙头,是水啊。所以你应把这种感觉留在心里。你会发现什么是最适合你的,但你需要在生活中设置一些停止的标志。嗯,当你能够停下脚步,接下来的事情是观察。你要体会,睁开眼睛,打开耳朵,打通鼻子。你要打开所有的感觉去享受生命赐予我们的丰富多彩。这些快乐没有止境,这就是生活的全部,去享受,去享受上帝的恩赐。

And then we can also open our hearts, our hearts for the opportunities, for the opportunities also to help others, to make others happy, because nothing makes us more happy than when all of us are happy. And when we open our hearts to the opportunities, the opportunities invite us to do something, and that is the third. Stop, look, and then go, and really do something. And what we can do is whatever life offers to you in that present moment. Mostly it's the opportunity to enjoy, but sometimes it's something more difficult.

然后我们就会敞开心扉,去享受这些机会,去把握这些机会去帮助别人,让别人快乐,因为没有比让大家开心更让我们快乐的事了。而且当我们真心接受这些机会时,这些机会会促使我们去做些事情,这就是第三点。停下来,想一想,然后去做,真正去做一些事情。此刻我所能做的就是生活给我们的或好或坏的东西。大多时候它是让我们享受的机会,但是有些时候这些东西让我们很难受。

But whatever it is, if we take this opportunity, we go with it, we are creative, those are the creative people, and that little stop, look, go, is such a potent seed that it can revolutionize our world. Because we need, we are at the present moment in the middle of a change of consciousness, and you will be surprised if you -- I am always surprised when I hear how many times this word "gratefulness" and "gratitude" comes up. Everywhere you find it, a grateful airline, a restaurant gratefulness, a cafe gratefulness, a wine that is gratefulness. Yes, I have even come across a toilet paper that the brand is called Thank You. (Laughter) There is a wave of gratefulness because people are becoming aware how important this is and how this can change our world. It can change our world in immensely important ways, because if you're grateful, you're not fearful, and if you're not fearful, you're not violent. If you're grateful, you act out of a sense of enough and not of a sense of scarcity, and you are willing to share. If you are grateful, you are enjoying the differences between people, and you are respectful to everybody, and that changes this power pyramid under which we live.

但是无论它是是什么,如果我们好好把握这个机会,我就会与它相伴,我们会充满创造力,那些充满创造力的人和我们所说的停止,思考,实践就像一个强力的种子,一个可以彻底改变世界的种子。因为我们需要,因为我们都在当前的这个意识波动的时刻,而且你会惊讶于——我总是很惊讶,当我好多次听到这世界上的感恩和感激的出现。任何地方你都可以发现感恩,一个充满感激的航空公司,一个餐馆的感恩,一个咖啡的感恩,一杯葡萄酒,这也是感恩。是的,我还看到过一个“谢谢”牌的厕纸。感恩就像波浪一样传播出去,因为人们会意识到感恩是多么的重要,意识到感恩是怎样改变世界的。感恩会以非常重要的方式改变世界,因为如果你心怀感激,你就不会害怕,如果你不害怕,你就不会发动战争。如果你心怀感激,你就会知足而不是感到匮乏,然后你就会愿意分享。如果你心怀感激,你就会欣赏人们之间的不同之处,你就会尊重每一个人,这些会改变我们生活的权力金字塔。

And it doesn't make for equality, but it makes for equal respect, and that is the important thing. The future of the world will be a network, not a pyramid, not a pyramid turned upside down. The revolution of which I am speaking is a nonviolent revolution, and it's so revolutionary that it even revolutionizes the very concept of a revolution, because a normal revolution is one where the power pyramid is turned upside down and those who were on the bottom are now on the top and are doing exactly the same thing that the ones did before. What we need is a networking of smaller groups, smaller and smaller groups who know one another, who interact with one another, and that is a grateful world.

感恩并没有让世界平等,但是让我们学会平等尊重彼此,这才是最重要的。未来的世界将会是一个网络而不是一个金字塔,不是一个倒置的金字塔。我所说的革命是一场非暴力的革命,它是如此的具有革命性,以至于彻底改变了改革的概念,因为一个平常的革命是将金字塔倒过来,在金字塔底层的人,革命后到了金字塔的顶端,却做着和原来金字塔顶层人一模一样的事。我们需要的是一个由小团体组成的网络,越来越小的团体相互之间非常了解,他们之间相互影响,这将是一个充满感恩的世界。

A grateful world is a world of joyful people. Grateful people are joyful people, and joyful people, the more and more joyful people there are, the more and more we'll have a joyful world. We have a network for grateful living, and it has mushroomed. We couldn't understand why it mushroomed. We have an opportunity for people to light a candle when they are grateful for something. And there have been 15 million candles lit in one decade. People are becoming aware that a grateful world is a happy world, and we all have the opportunity by the simple stop, look, go, to transform the world, to make it a happy place. And that is what I hope for us, and if this has contributed a little to making you want to do the same, stop, look, go.

一个充满感恩的世界是快乐的人的世界。心怀感激的人是快乐的,而且,快乐的人越来越多,我们的世界就越来越快乐。我们有一个心怀感恩生活的网络,而且它在迅速成长。我们不知道它怎么会成长得这么快。每当他们对一些东西心生感激时,我们就点亮一支蜡烛,我们在过去的十年中点亮了1500万支蜡烛。人们意识到感恩的世界是快乐的世界,我们每个人都有机会通过停止,思考,实践,改变我们周围的世界,创造一个快乐的世界。这就是我对大家的希望,如果我讲的这些东西让你想变得快乐,只需要停下来,想一想,然后去做。

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