I have an anxious, hypervigilant coping style. I like to anticipate many different scenarios and give myself plenty of mental space to think through how I'd cope if those things happened. On the other hand, my Mom is a firm believer in never worrying about anything until it happens. My approach seems like a huge waste of time and energy to someone with my Mom's cognitive style. It's true that it does "waste" a lot of emotional energy to think through all sorts of scenarios that don't end up happening, but my approach helps me limit surprises and makes it easier for me to cope. It works for me, and I feel capable of taking on stressful situations because I have a coping mechanism that suit me, even if it is very labor-intensive. You have to know what works for you. When other people's cognitive styles differ from your own, it's important to recognize that they're approaching the situation based on what works best for them. We don't all need to be the same. With acceptance, you can learn to enjoy people who have different cognitive styles from your own. Even if your natural style is one way, you might find yourself wanting the support of people who have a different style in particular moments that you need that.我有一种焦虑、高度警惕的应对方式。 我喜欢预测各种不同的情况，给自己足够的精神空间来思考，如果这些事情发生了，我该如何应对。 另一方面，我妈妈坚信在事情发生之前不要担心任何事情。 对于像我妈妈那样的认知风格的人来说，我的方法似乎是对时间和精力的巨大浪费。 的确，考虑各种最终不会发生的情况确实会“浪费”大量的情感能量，但我的方法帮助我限制了惊喜，并使我更容易应对。 这对我很有用，我觉得自己有能力承受压力，因为我有一个适合自己的应对机制，即使这是非常劳动密集型的工作。 你必须知道什么适合你。 当其他人的认知方式与你的不同时，重要的是要认识到他们是根据对他们最有效的方式来处理问题的。 我们不需要都是一样的。 随着接受，你可以学会享受那些与你有不同认知风格的人。 即使你的自然风格是一种方式，你可能会发现自己需要那些在特定时刻拥有不同风格的人的支持。
