1. Q&A

1. Because the only way to achieve meaning and a sense of importance in one's life is through a rejection of alternatives. Saying no to meaningless and frivolous things enables u to focus on What really matters in life.

I do have a hard time of turning down my roomate's requests. She often asks me to do her small favors, such as fetching parcels for her, lending money and student card(for food at the canteen since she is always broke). After a bazillion times' of small favors, I get really tired of her messing up and bothering me to clear up for her, but it's so hard to let out the word when she asks me for help. One day, she wanted to borrow my student card to borrow books from our library. The reason was that her card couldn't function well since she lost books she borrowed before(typical of her). I was really reluctant but she said it was an emergency Because she was gonna head home and she craved the book. I finally gave in. The next day I got up, I was so annoyed by my decision. I had a stong hunch that she was gonna mess up sth. It turned out I was right, she forgot to return the book in time and would almost have forgotten where she had put the book if I didn't remind her of it. Next time, I think I won't be so easily persuaded. She should learn to be responsible for her own problems and figure out a way. I should also stop taking responsibility for her problems.

2. Because the trip to Saint Peterburg extricated him from the values of his culture and shows him that another society can live with entirely different values and still function. This helps him reexamine the fake-nice communication that is so common in his culture.

3. Commitment gives u freedom Because u are no longer distracted by the unimportant and frivolous.

4. To build Trust u have to be honest about your own values and allow conflict to happen. If u break the Trust, u have to peel away at your self-awareness onion and figure out what fucked-up values cause u to break the Trust. You should express your shitty values and show that those values have been overriden.

2. 感悟

Commitment gives u freedom Because u are no longer distracted by the unimportant and frivolous.

承诺或全心投入反而给你自由。因为你不再为不重要的琐事分心，可以专注于真正有意义有价值的事情。就像文中所说，你只有再工作了几十年才会到达精益求精的境地，只有与伴侣相伴五十年才能金婚带给你的是什么，只有在一个地方住上好多年才能体会到不一样的风情。当我们鼓励生命的宽度时，更应该关注生命的深度。广泛但浅薄的人生是没什么意义的。

Trust is like a china plate. If u break it once, with some care and attention u can put it back together again. But if u break it again, it splits into even more pieces and it takes far longer to piece together again. If u break it more and more times, eventually it shatters to the point where it's impossible to restore.

信任就像瓷器，你把它打破以后细心粘补还是可以拼回原样。如果又打破一次，瓷器会摔成更多的碎片，你也要花更长的时间修补，你一而再再而三得打破它，最终它会被摔得粉碎，再也不可能修复好了。信任很难建立却及容易破碎，即使以后修补好了，也会有裂痕，让信任更加脆弱，所以不要轻易破坏掉信任。

3. Words&phrases

By this time my little dating advice blog was getting some traffic.

to become more popular and be viewed by a certain amout of people. 有流量，有点击率

The news website is getting more traffic.

There was nothing combative about the way she said it.

aggressive

But as the weeks wore on, I got used to the Russian frankness.

wear on: go by, pass

I became more anxious as the time wore on.

I started appreciating it for what it really was: unadulterated expression.

pure, without any fake stuff

unadulterated food

And as someone who had been starved of this kind of blunt expression

lack of

The company is starved of talents.

He then totally loses his marbles.

lose one's mind