MY ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Having secured direct admission to this postgraduate programme, I indulged myself in the comfort zone for a long time. Unwittingly soaked in laziness and aimlessness, all I planned at that time was to fritter away the next two years, barely meeting the lowest standards and never taking up challenging tasks, for I would land a job with the graduation certificate sooner or later. But my plan of “lying flat” was disrupted with the presence of you, Mr. Yu.
I still remember the first day I arrived at your office. When I walked up to you with my heart pumping nervously, you gently invited me to be seated, next to you. Actually, maintaining a standing position in front of teachers was what I had been used to since a very young age. But that day, sitting beside you, I felt that I was not lectured by you, but involved in the talk with you. Although some of your words escaped my mind, yet your soothing voice lingered on well into the present. Since then, I have become somewhat “thick-skinned” in face of you, daring to share with you every aspect of myself, including pieces of immature thoughts and moments of mental fluctuations.
My knowledge of SLA is loosely-structured, but I am never afraid of telling you my fragmented academic inspirations. Once I was stuck halfway when talking about the manual-automatic integrated feedback, due to a shortage of literature reading. My heart began to race and my mind went blank for fear of your disappointment; however, instead of blaming me for my clumsiness, you helped me fix the loopholes in my understanding, explaining to me the big picture of manual-automatic integrated feedback, from its origin in natural language processing to its application to current English writing classes. What a walking academic dictionary you are! “Read more books,” you told me, looking smilingly into my eyes. All of a sudden, I was overwhelmed by a sense of guilty. While you have been sparing no effort to polish my academic ability, for what kind of reason should I think of “lying flat” for these two years?
I also do not need to cover up my instant feelings in front of you, even those flashes of negativeness. Once I expressed my worries about being defeated in the teaching competition. Seeing the unconfidence in my eyes, you asked me in a calm and peaceful tone, “How do you know when you haven’t tried yet?” Your words lifted the heavy burden off my mind and encouraged me to do my endeavour whatever the result would be. On another occasion I told you frankly that my final dissertation could hardly reach the “pass” grade, let alone the “merit” one. You did not make any direct response, only advising me to finish it first. Then, through the revision process, you patiently offered me suggestions from the general structure to the language details, pushing me ahead little by little. Looking back on these days, I am awed by my academic potential you have dug out.
Mr. Yu, it is your profound knowledge and perfect personality that make me feel natural and comfortable to open up with you, never in a hurry to hide my imperfections. During these two years, no matter what I am going through, I know you are always there, witnessing my ups and downs while always expecting my progress towards perfection. I cannot imagine how my postgraduate years would be like without your presence. Maybe I would really get my way, “lying flat” for two years and sinking into mediocrity at last. Thank you, Mr. Yu, for enabling me to live through this period, not just pass by.
