There are many counterintuitive situations in love and romance. For example, scums (渣男) are often more attractive to women than reliable straight men. The latter are more likely to be seen as docks (呆瓜，直男) even though they are faithful and reliable. Besides, many men train so hard as to become muscular, massive guys like The Rock or Arnold Schwarzenegger.
However, according to some research, women are repelled by the bulky, strong Alfa men who seem intimidating and scary. It is the non-threatening gentlemen who appeal to women's tastes. Another word for a gentleman in Chinese is a considerate, caring man (暖男). The most successful men are those who combine femininity with masculinity, whereas these muscular men are more attractive to men than to women.
Having put the facts on the table, we need to find out the real reason why scums are more attractive to women. The answer is that they do not care so much about women. This kind of indifference may seem cool in the eyes of women. Besides, these scum guys are old hands at catching women, having a sweet tongue and a slippery demeanour, which sets them apart from the vast majority of men. They are also adventurous. And since they do not want to make a long-term commitment to a woman, they do not seem so eager to win women's hearts. This kind of detached attitude is extremely unusual for women, especially beautiful women who are often surrounded by eager, flattering men who bend over heads to please them.
The more men treat women overly nice in the early stages, the more inferiority they convey to women about themselves. So, they are no match for those secretive scums who take a sometimes-cold-sometimes-hot attitude toward women.
According to Sun Tzu's Art of War (孙子兵法)， to conquer the target, you must first let go (欲擒故纵). So, learn all these strategies by heart: When you wish to attract someone, do not act too eagerly at first, but play casual as if you do not really care. Then your desired one will feel relaxed and curiously attracted to you. As you gradually build a solid friendship with each other, treat him or her loyally and caringly, give him or her enough attention, and spend as much time and money as you can on him or her. The result will be a golden love relationship that develops naturally.
