虽然是工科生，可是一直到读完《Chernobyl Prayer: A Chronicle of the Future》，我才发觉自己对于核辐射的了解简直就是一张白纸。
这本书的作者是2015年的诺贝尔文学奖得主，白俄罗斯的阿列克谢耶维奇。在这之前，没有读过任何她的作品。就连读这本书的初衷，也是源自HBO今年的迷你神剧《Chernobyl》。但是，我也没并没有看过这部片子，连宣传片都没有看过。只是偶闻，它很火。。。
因为读的是英文版，比预想的还是慢了许多。但是，那种触目惊心的感觉，并未影响丝毫。这是一场史无前例的核灾难，在它的面前，人类显得是多么的渺小和脆弱。作者通过被采访的幸存者的口述独白，透露出这场灾难所造成的痛苦，就如同那挥之不去的核辐射般残留在逝者及幸存者的体内。
当一名妻子去莫斯科的医院探望从核电站回来的新婚丈夫时，医院的护士对她说：他现在已经不能算是人类了，他是一个核反应堆。你们两个人都会灰飞烟灭的。
"He isn't a person now, he's a nuclear reactor. You'll both frazzle together."
而当这些从核电站退下来的勇士，最终在医院里一个个死去时，对他们曾经短暂住过的医院，作者这样写道：
When they'd all died, they refurbished the hospital. Scraped down the walls, ripped up the parquest and got rid of all the woodwork.
丈夫死后的两个月，那位新婚妻子，产下一名女婴。只是，这个新生儿，天生就有心脏病，肝硬化，身上所携带的辐射线剂量严重超标。可怜的小生命仅仅在人间停留了短短四个小时，就夭折了。但是这名小女婴，却在无意中挽救了她的妈妈，小小的她替妈妈抵挡了所有的核辐射。
“My little girl saved me, she took the whole brunt of the radiation herself, like she was a buffer.”
在核辐射的重灾区，死了的老鼠连猫都不吃，任由它们横尸遍野。死亡无处不在，但这是另一种截然不同的死亡。
“And I was told the cats has stopped eating the dead mice, leaving them strewn over the fileds and yards. Death lurked everywhere, but this was a different sort of death."
一个受到严重辐射的男人，生命垂危。医生对他的妻子说：不要走近他！不要亲吻他！不要拥抱他！这已经不再是你爱的那个男人，它是一个污染源。
A doctor tells a woman whose husband is dying, 'No going near him! No kissing! No cuddling! This is no longer the man you love, it's a contaminated object.'
什么是辐射？
在灾区的普普通通的居民眼里，辐射就是所有母鸡的鸡冠都变成了黑色，而不是正常的红色；牛奶也不再变酸，而是凝结成块，白色的牛奶块。
All the hen's combs were black, not red: that was the radiation.
The milk wouldn't sour, it curdled into lumps, these white lumps. It was radiation.
切尔诺贝利，不是战争，但它的残酷和给三个前苏联联邦国家（白俄罗斯，乌克兰和俄罗斯）造成的永远无法抹去的痛苦和伤害，却远远超过任何一场战争。
在切尔诺贝利，只有死了的人才允许回去。而他们是被带回去，用水泥永远封存在地下。
在这里，就连甲虫和蠕虫都不见了踪影。而他们的消失，也是辐射过高的第一个危险信号。
河对岸的街上住着的所有女人，都失去了她们的男人。那里没有男人，因为男人都死去了。谁也不明白，为什么上帝会先带走男人？
一个刚刚从切尔诺贝利回来的清洁工父亲，一到家，就将身上所有的东西脱掉，然后将它们丢进了垃圾滑槽。但是，他却留下了一顶帽子，将它作为礼物送了自己的小儿子。因为，孩子一直央求着要那个帽子，并将它戴在头上，一刻也不肯摘下。两年后，儿子被诊断出脑瘤。
另一名女受害者在讲述自己的女儿出生时说，那根本不是个孩子，而是一个活着的小麻袋，除了眼睛是睁开的之外，其余地方都严丝合缝。
"When she was born... It wasn't a child, but a little living sack, stitched up on all sides, without a signle slit, only the eys were open."
还有一名受害者，用一个不知从哪里听来的“土方子”来“自我解毒”：
将一勺自己鹅屎倒进一瓶伏特加，静置两天，然后喝掉。。。和丈夫
“Put one spoonful of goose droppings in a bottle of vodak, let it stand for two days and drink it.”
而最让我动容的还是最后一个故事的女主人公，自始至终对深爱着的丈夫都不离不弃。当丈夫的血管迸裂，开始大出血而无法帮他止住的时候。她只能从浴室取一个脸盆。血滴进盆里，就像是母牛的奶落进奶桶。
"His blood vessels burtst and he began to haemorrihage. 'Oh dear,' I would cry. 'The bleeding again.' From his neck, his cheeks, his ears. All over the place. I would bring cold water, apply compresses. They didn't really help. I would bring a basin from the bathroom. The blood dripped into it, like a cow's milk hitting the pail. That sound, so peaceful and rural."
别人死后，身体都随即变冷变僵。而她的丈夫死后，躺在那里，身体滚烫。
"He died and lay there, so hot you couldn't touch him. I stopped all the clocks in the house... It was seven in the morning... our clocks are all stopped to this day, you can't restart them... The clock repairer came. He just shrugged and said, 'It's not mechanical, not physics. It's Metaphysics."
据说，切尔诺贝利的受害者死后，身体会发光。每当夜幕降临，他们的坟头就会出现一道光。
Chernobyl victims were said to glow... At night, a light would appear above their graves.
在莫斯科一处公墓，当地人都不愿将自己死去的亲人埋在那些死去的切尔诺贝利消防员的旁边。如果连死人都惧怕死人，就更不提那些活着的人了......
“Local people wouldn't bury their own dead alongside them (the Chernobyl firemen who had died)......The dead afriad of the dead... to say nothing of the living.”
