Loveswept is the name of a romantic fragrance from philosophy "sparking with energy and passion". After trying various kinds of products all from established brands, I bought Loveswept without much hesitation. The soft floral scent, a lively mix of freshness and sweetness was just what I had been looking for. It's a perfect choice, except for its name.
Love swept? Would I be cursed to be loved so for such a short period that felt like a wind swepting away? This thoughts flashed across my mind every time I saw the delicate package. Murphy's law sates anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. We try hard to resist the law, obviously there are always several times we have to believe in the prevalent law. In my case, the unhappy relationship ended before I used up the small bottle of fragrance.
Like other romantic stories, everything was fine at the beginning. The boy began chased the girl ever since their first meeting. I, the girl felt more and more obsessed with the boy. From the beginning to the end, I never succeeded to fall asleep without the unsolved question: whether should I continue or stop it before uncontrolled damage going on?
Before everything happened, I knew better than anyone else that we were not the perfect one for each other. I am an ordinary girl, tender, affectionate, without much romantic experience. He has a hard heart barely expressing his inner feeling. When we had lunch together, if he was upset, it was unstoppable. He might talk a little about his frustrating which was more like talking to himself. Till the end, I haven't learned to deal with such condition. I temporarily believe that it is not a matter of methods or communication skills, it's a matter of our personalities. What I learned is not to tryto enter in his heart or soften it. Even at this moment, I am not sure whether it was a wise compromise.
I was making efforts to create a natural relationship in my way. No positive feedback for the night call? Then no call. Regarding the career as the priority? Then minimize the dating time and study separately. No sweet words ever? Then build a strong heart for myself. Obviously, both of us didn't get what we need or want in this way.
In our only as well as last conversation, he explained it was his academic pressure made caused uncertainty. He needed undivided attention towards his career. I replied, it was actually because of the lack of affection. I am also not sure about many things in love. While there is one thing I believe, being together means many things, like happiness and support each other, rather than burden, pressure or distraction which seemed to be his view of the whole relationship.
A dozen of questions I haven't got a chance to figure out. What was he like in true love? What was he thinking at that unfinished night? How did he think about me? However, I would not urge to ask them even if I will have the chance.
I still don't consider the relationship as a mistake, though the pain seems to outweigh the gain. Someone, it is worth to spend a period of time with, just not that a long time. I still like his concentration and confidence in mastering different kinds of skills. What's more, like a bonus of a round of the game, he influenced much on my cooking style.
On the other hand, I will not choose to date any guy like him or any guy who is not suitable for me. It turns out that Yan is right: Love is not a matter of working hard. Yellow adding blue turns to green. You can never got red with those two colors.
I returned to my regular routine. Sadly, it takes longer to recover than the formation of damage. Before I knew him, I had been in a fantastic condition. I took exercise everyday and resulted in good body shape. I had close friends in church and fully prepared for the new semester. The tempo was destroyed. For the whole October, I am comforting myself, turning to god and keeping exercise. However, even I copied the set of schedule, the spirit can be copied. I have became a new person with new memory and experience.
Everything about life is going on. Men are like the subway, if you missed this round, there is always the next round coming in a few minutes. Never give up being faithful, hopeful and cool. This is where fun begins.
