2018-01-26 The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck - 006

Reading Journal - The Subtle Art of Not Giving  a F*ck

20180125-26  Chapter 6 You're Wrong about Everything

-Q & A

001 Why “we are wrong about everything”?

Because recognizing faults and imperfections in our past thoughts and views means we really grow up and be more mature.

002 What caused “false memory syndrome”?

It’s our poor memory and rejection of the fact that we are actually big fat liars because we are used to filling in the plot holes of our memory with our own embellishments to make sure everything makes sense and we’re not crazy.

003 Tell us a story where you had adamantly thought you were right, but later you found you were wrong.

When I was in high school, I hated doing things I didn’t like, and even avoided talking to people I didn’t think were nice. I adamantly believed that whoever acted like that is apple polishers. But later, I gradually realized that life doesn’t work that way. Trying to be nice is actually trying to be polite. And just like the author put in this book, “ if it’s down to me being screwed up, or everybody else being screwed up, it is far, far, far more likely that I’m the one who’s screwed up.”

004 How to be a little less certain of yourself? Please include a personal example.

If we want to be a little less certain of ourselves, then whenever we find something or someone being screwed up, we should try to ask ourselves what if we are wrong and figure out the causes and solutions if we are wrong. For example,  when I find my parents keep nagging me to clean my room. I should think about whether there is something wrong with my behaviors and attitudes and more importantly, what they really want rather than being pissed off.

- Take-away message -

001 这一章的内容很有感触,作者和最近马上要啃完的《思考,快与慢》一书的作者观点相同,认为人类对因果关系的执着为我们带来很多不愉快。很多时候,生活中并没有那么多因和果,但我们非要人为地创造这种联系,认为这样才有意义。所以我们才会不由自主地按照符合自己价值观的逻辑去改造自己的记忆。

002 记得政治书上有一句话,和这一章里强调的道理有点类似,讲的是,不要用现在的成熟去嘲笑昨天的幼稚。 我们一直追求正确,但事实是,人很难真正地正确,更让我们难以接受和认清楚的是,只有认识到自己以前的错误和不完美,才证明我们有进步有提高。这个和我一直给学生强调的“学习本身就应该是痛苦的,因为不让你痛苦的就是你会的,但那并不能让你学到东西”道理很类似,但遗憾的是我却没有及时认识到作者强调的这一点。

- Words & Expressions -

001 concede

原文:“We must intellectually strip them away, see their faults and biases, see how they don’t fit in with much of the rest of the world, to stare our own ignorance in the face and concede, because our own ignorance is greater than us all.”

释义:v. to admit that something is true or correct, although you wish it were not true (不得不)承认

造句: I conceded that I had tried to be correct all the time and that made me stressful.

002 heap praise/insults on somebody

原文:“They will laugh at how we were afraid to show appreciation for those who matter to us most, yet heaped praise on public figures who didn’t deserve anything.”

释义:to praise, insult etc someone a lot 对某人极力称赞/百般侮辱等

造句:It's rather immature for us  to heap all the blame on others.

003 chip away at something

原文:“and as I grow older and more experienced, I chip away at how wrong I am, becoming less and less wrong every day”

释义:to gradually make something less effective or destroy it 〔逐步〕削弱;〔不断〕损害

造句:Being honest to ourselves and brave to accept our imperfections and faults can chip away the influence of “false memory syndrome”.

004 spoiler

原文:“Spoiler alert!”

释义:n. a message or report that is intended to ruin the surprising part of a popular film, book etc by telling people about the surprise before they see or read it 剧情透露,剧透

造句: Don’t you think spoiler is unacceptable?

005 gratifying

原文:“Some of the best and most gratifying experiences of our lives are also the most distracting and demotivating.”

释义:adj. pleasing and satisfying 令人高兴的,令人满意的

造句:It’s gratifying to note that all the tasks have been finished.

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