悲悯的情怀

文/克彦

早晨去散步，在公园足球场的露天看台上有舞者在跳舞，我就停下脚步驻足观看，还有三三两两的观众，也有挑着担子卖食物和点心的货郎。

这时候，一个人走到一个货郎担前，搂起上衣指着自己系了带子的裤子。她个子很高，有165的样子，头发却很短。我本以为是个男孩，突然看到她裸露的双乳，桃子一样浑圆笔挺，才知道是个女孩，顶多20来岁的样子。那个卖早餐的货郎赶快把头扭了过去，退了退身体。看到货郎没理她，她便转身走向了另一边。她刚刚走，货郎急忙挑着担子飞快地也走了。她又去了花池边另一个男人身旁重复同样的动作，那先生也急忙退缩。她又向舞着们走去，在那里，只见一个裹了头纱的女士在为她解裤带，她可能是裤带解不开了，自己内急也没办法。那位女士很耐心的给她解裤带，但可能被她自己缠绕了很多圈，那位女士也着急，脸上显示出为难的神情，她把自己的戒指都脱了下来为这个女孩解裤子。女孩用下巴夹着上衣，双乳依然裸露，没有穿内衣，看来可能是精神有问题。

我突然很难过，像心疼自己的孩子一样心疼起她。也许女人的怜悯之心是天生的。记得我的幼儿园大班里有两个个子较高年龄最大的女孩，还有一个个子超级小年龄也小的男孩，和其他的孩子都差不多，每次去小便或是在活动室玩耍，两个大点的女孩子都会拉着小男生的手和他一起玩过家家，骑木马或者是跷跷板，俨然小妈妈一样的呵护和关心，小男孩仿佛也很依赖他们的样子。有一次一个助教来帮我，跟我说她听到她俩叫这个小男生宝贝！哈哈，我们都笑了，更多的时候看到她们抱抱他，亲亲他，应该就不足为奇了。孩提时候的喜欢，是最纯粹的，互相亲吻，也是菲国继承西方传统的一个典型。在家教好的家里，小朋友要拉了客人的手亲吻，朋友之间无论男女亲切的问候或离别也是拥抱和亲吻脸颊。两个小姑娘对小男孩的照顾，倒是省去了我不少的心力，他们沟通起来也会顺畅许多。女孩的母爱，是天生的。

舞者女士费了好大劲才给她解开，汗顺着脸颊流了下来，但好像带子太长她又不知所措。女孩提了裤子走出看台，她的步子很快，远远的停在了公园边卖花的摊位前，只见卖花的老奶奶拿了剪刀把她的裤带剪了，剪短还不够，她好像厌烦了这带子，让奶奶给她全部剪掉。可是，剪掉带子的裤子就无法系住了，她只能双手提了裤子往看台走，和我擦身而过，一脸无助的神情，还有些呆滞的目光，转身进了看台。我也无心再散步，准备回去。隔着公园的栅栏，一个花丛的角落，她在小便，不知道憋了多久。小便完又旁若无人的离开，朝着另一个角落走去。那里还有一个蜷缩着的姑娘，长长的头发，破旧的衣服，不知道她们是不是一家人。菲国没有计划生育政策，听这里老师说有些菲人的家庭会生十几个孩子，没有办法抚养了就去乞讨，政府不管生育，也不管抚养。也常看到年轻的父母带着几个孩子乞讨的，但欣慰一点的是他们多是健康的孩子，很少把正常的孩子弄残疾了再去乞讨，无论什么样的生活，至少他们和父母在一起，即使乞讨，也是一种幸福。

离公园越来越远了，那裸露双乳的瞬间却在我的脑海挥之不去。她的裤子，是随时都会掉下去的。明天，不知道她是否还在这里，我该带条皮筋绳的裤子给他。

我可怜的孩子。

7.17

                                      Compassion

Going for a walk in the morning, bleachers have dancers are dancing at the football stadium in park, I stopped to watch, and audience in twos and threes, there are sellers who is picking a burden to sell itinerant peddler of meals and snacks.

At this time, a man came up to a traveling salesman, he raised his coat and tie his strap trousers. She is tall, about 165 tall, and her hair is short.. I thought this was a boy, suddenly saw her bare breasts which look like round peaches and straight, I just know that she is a girl, at most she is in her 20’s  The peddler selling breakfast quickly threw back her head and back body. Seeing the salesman did not care for her, she turned to the other side. She just walked hurriedly peddler who is carrying the burden is left quickly. She went to the pond side, another man beside her repeat the same action, then a Mister hurried back. She went to the dancers there, I saw a girl who wrapped in a veil and helped her untied her belt, she may be belted by herself, she doesn't open, their urgency also does not have ways. The lady was very patient to solve her belt, but maybe by her own wound a lot of laps, the lady is anxious, difficult facial expression appears on his face, she put his ring off to solve this girl’s problem. The girl is holding a coat with his chin, still showing her bare breasts, not wearing underwear, she may seem to have mental problems.

I suddenly feel very sad, I love her just as my child. Perhaps the compassion of a woman is born naturally. I remember in my kindergarten, there are two taller oldest girls, and a small boy, and the other children are similar, every time I go to urinate or is playing in the activity room, two girls will took the boy's hand and he together pretend playing, ride a horse or a seesaw, seems to have little mother like care and concern, the little boy seems to be very dependent on their way. There is a teaching assistant once who helped me, told me that she heard them call the boy baby! Haha, we all laughed, they kissed him, and hug him, should be not at all surprising. Like as a child, is the most pure, kiss each other, but also the inheritance of a typical Western tradition. In the home, a good home, a child would pull the guest’s hand and kiss, regardless of the cordial greetings or parting between friends, and parting is also hugging and kissing cheeks. Two little girls care for the little boy, but it saves me a lot of heart, their communication will be more smoothly. The girl's love, is born naturally.

The dancer took a great effort to unlock her, and sweat ran down her cheek, but it seemed that the tape was too long and she was at a loss.. Girl took her pants and went out of the stands, her pace is fast, she stopped at the edge of the Park Flower stalls in the former, she saw the flower granny who was selling flowers took a pair of scissors to cut her belt, cutting short is not enough, she seems tired of the tape, let grandma cut off all her belt. However, cut the ribbon and the trousers can not be tied, she can only provide the pants by hands and go to stand, and she past by me, with a face of helpless look, some fishy eyes, turned into the stands. I have no mood to take a walk, ready to go back. Across the park fence, a corner of the flowers, she is in the urine, I do not know how long she holds. After pee, she left again, went toward another corner. There is also a girl who curled up, with long hair, and old clothes, I do not know if they are not a family. Philippine has no plans to fertility policy, it is said by the teacher here that some Filipinos families have more than a dozen children, there is no way raised children but begging, the government pay no attention to the growth or the support. I also often see young parents with several children begging, but the happy thing is that they are healthy children rarely made normal children disability to beg, no matter what kind of life, at least they and their parents together, even begging and a kind of happiness.

From the park, it is farther away, the bare breasts of the moment is still lingering in my mind. Her pants are always falling off.. Tomorrow, I do not know whether she was here or not, I should take a pair of pants with rubber rope to her.

My poor child.