Newspaper headline: Times are changing
新闻大标题:时代在改变
译:十一安
来源:GlobalTimes
一:被冠以剩字的女性
Younger Chinese men are pushing aside the notion of leftover women and becoming more accepting of dating and marrying older women. Photo: Li Hao/GT
年轻的中国男性将剩女这个概念抛之脑后,并且他们越来越接受与年轻较大的女性约会、结婚。
Zhang Quan works in a financial company in Beijing, and will soon turn 30. She is not married, and she does not currently have a boyfriend. Her family is worried that she will become a "leftover woman" in the marriage market, but she is not worried at all.
Zhang Quan是北京一金融公司的职员,很快她将迈进30岁的大关。她单身未婚,并且目前也没有男朋友。她的家人担心她将变成婚姻市场上的“剩女”,然而她本人并不担心。
She has been categorized as a shengnü (leftover woman) for a few years.
早些年前,她就已经被归为剩女一类。
According to social customs in China, unmarried women over the age of 27 fall into this category. "When the concept of shengnü first came out, everyone around me kept saying how serious the situation was. I was really worried for a while," Zhang said. "I worried that if I did not rush to land a husband, I would become a pathetic old woman that has no potential to find a good man."
根据中国社会观念,超过27岁仍未婚的单身女性通常都被归为“剩女”一类。“当剩女这一概念刚开始出现风行时,我周围的人都一直跟我说我的情况有多糟糕。那时候我还担心了好一阵子。”Zhang说道,“我担心如果我不赶紧找个丈夫,我就要变成一个可怜巴巴的老女人,并且也不可能再找到好男人了。”
As a result, Zhang entered into several unsatisfying relationships. She thought they might be a good fit as a husband.
抱着这样的心态,Zhang试了很多段不令人满意的恋爱。她原本以为这些人可以成为她的未来丈夫。
"I worried that finding a boyfriend would be more difficult as I got older, because men are naturally more attracted to younger women, and I think a woman's charm decreases as she gets older," Zhang said.
“我担心当我年纪越来越大,我就越难找到男朋友,因为喜欢比自己年轻的女性是男人的天性,而且我认为女性的魅力也会随着她们的年纪增长而下降。”Zhang说道。
However, a series of recent news stories reporting that older, successful and charming women managed to land a much younger attractive man and find true love, gave Zhang more confidence and inspiration that made her no longer fear being a leftover woman.
然而,近来一系列的新闻故事报道,年纪越大,事业有成并且有魅力的女性会设法吸引比自己年轻的男性并且找到真爱,这些报道让Zhang有了更多的自信和鼓舞,她不再害怕变成剩女了。
二:大龄女性的反攻
The first report disclosed that 48-year-old Wendi Deng, the ex-wife of 85-year-old billionaire mogul Rupert Murdoch, found love with a 21-year-old Hungarian male model. Not to mention, in previous years, there were also older female celebrities finding love with younger men, like Gao Yuanyuan, Ruby Lin and Michelle Chen.
第一篇报道是关于48岁的邓文迪,85岁高龄的亿万富翁传媒大亨默多克的前妻,她跟21岁的男模特小鲜肉相爱。不消说,很多年以前,也有年纪大的女性著名人物跟小鲜肉相爱的故事,比如高圆圆,林心如,陈妍希等。
"I feel that I no longer need to be afraid of being a leftover, because I can continue to become a better person as time goes by, and more men nowadays can appreciate that," Zhang said.
“我觉得我不需要再担心自己是剩女,因为随着时间的流逝,我会不断地提升自己,越来越多的男性会欣赏这样的女性的。”Zhang说道。
More Chinese women are pursuing their own interests and trying to be the best version of themselves, instead of securing a marriage right away. Photo: Li Hao/GT
更多的中国女性会追求自己的兴趣梦想,并努力做最好的自己,而不是马上结婚。
三:近年来男性眼中的大龄女性
Appreciating maturity 欣赏女性成熟美
Wang Pengcheng, a 30-year-old designer from Wuxi, Jiangsu Province, married a woman who is 11 years older than he is.
王鹏程 30岁,来自江苏无锡,是个设计师,他娶了一个比他大11岁的女性为妻。
"I don't care about the age difference. For me, I feel lucky that I found a woman I love who is really suitable for me, and that woman happens to be 11 years older," Wang said.
“我不在乎年龄差距。对于我来说,我觉得能找到跟我特别合适、我爱的人为妻,我很幸运,只是这个人刚好比我大11岁而已。”王说道。
Wang and his wife met through a friend. Wang's friend showed him photos of younger women, because according to the common Chinese social customs, it is better if a woman is younger than the man in a relationship. However, Wang was not attracted to any of the women until he saw his future wife's photo.
王和他的妻子是通过朋友介绍的。根据中国一贯的社会风俗,恋爱中女性比男性的年纪小会比较好,所以王的朋友给王看的照片都是年纪轻的女性照片。然而王都没有被那些女性吸引,直到他看到妻子的照片。
"I was immediately attracted by her. Her eyes were so mysterious. I can see that she has been through a lot, and she is mature," Wang said. "I knew she was older than me, but I didn't care."
“一看到她的照片我就被吸引住了。她的双眸神秘迷人,我可以看得出她经历了许多,她很成熟。”王说道,“我知道她年纪比我大,但我不在乎。”
When they started to get to know each other, Wang realized they have very similar values and they always have a lot to talk about. This made their love grow stronger.
当他们开始了解彼此时,王意识到他们之间的价值观很相近,彼此之间总有话聊。这让他们的爱更坚韧。
"Age is not important; it's the life experience one has had and whether that person holds a positive attitude toward life that make other people feel comfortable," Wang said. "I want a partner who is independent, has her own charms and her own career. I want a woman I do not have to take care of all the time."
“年龄并不重要;重要的是这个人所拥有的经历和他是否持有积极的态度面对生活,并让对方感到舒适自在,”王说道。“我希望我的伴侣是独立的,有自己的魅力所在和自己的事业。我不希望我的另一半总需要我去照顾她。”
Before his wife, Wang dated women who were much younger than he was, but most of them were immature and always needed him to compromise for them.
在结婚之前,王曾跟比他年轻很多岁的女性约会过,但是大部分的人都不成熟,总是需要他对她妥协让步。
"I don't think women like that would make a great life partner," he said.
“我觉得那样的女性并不能找到好的伴侣。”他说道。
"I don't agree with the notion of leftover woman. We can't categorize all the older women who are single as leftover women. The older women who have their own lives, careers, hobbies, dreams and fight really hard to achieve the best version of themselves and never give up, are not leftover women," Wang said. "They become even more charming as they get older, such as my wife."
“我不同意剩女这个概念。我们不能将所有单身的年纪大的女性定义为剩女。年纪稍大的女性有他们自己的生活,事业,爱好和梦想,并为之努力奋斗,提升自我到最好的程度,并且从不言弃,他们不是剩女,”王说道,“随着他们年纪越来越大,他们也变得越来越有魅力,就像我的妻子一样。”
When Wang announced that he was getting married to an older woman, his parents and friends worried that their marriage would not last because she would age quicker than he would, but Wang was not worried at all.
当王宣布自己要跟比自己年纪大的女性结婚时,他的父母和他的朋友都担心这段婚姻无法持续很久,因为妻子老得比他快,但是王根本就不在意。
"Everyone will grow old. In marriage, the important thing is not whether she is young and beautiful every day; it's whether the two people's character and personality fit and whether they are comfortable with each other,"
“每个人都有老去的一天。婚姻中,重要的并不是她是否是年轻的,每天都漂漂亮亮的,而是这两个人的性格和个性是否合适,跟彼此相处时是否舒适。”
Martin Sun, a Chinese financial statement auditor who now lives in Canada, is also engaged to a woman older than he is.
Martin Sun,现居住于加拿大的中国财务审计员也跟一个比他年纪大的女性订婚。
"Age is really just a number if you click mentally, emotionally and physically," Sun said.
“如果你心理上、情感上和身体上都接受这段感情的话,年龄真的只是个数字而已。”Sun说道。
"Older women are still fabulous, beautiful and amazing, and they are generally more independent; why would we care so much about these external factors instead of paying attention to a person's thoughts and spirit?" Sun said.
“年纪稍大的女性仍然是很好的,漂亮,惊人,而且他们总体上都很独立自主。为什么与其关注这些外部的因素,我们不多关注这个人的思想和内在精神?”Sun说道。
In recent years, more Chinese men are sharing the same beliefs as Wang and Sun, and are entering relationships with older women.
近年来,越来越多的中国男性都在分享跟王和孙同样的信念,跟年纪大的女性交往。
The marriage registration statistics in Nanjing, Jiangsu Province, according to a Xinmin Evening News report on January 2015, showed that there were 86,000 couples who were married in 2014, and 17.8 percent of them were younger men marrying older women.
根据2015年1月份的新民晚间新闻报道来看,南京婚姻登记统计数据显示2014年有86000对夫妻登记结婚,其中女性年纪大过男性伴侣的比率占了17.8。
四、大龄女性不惧
A rise in self-awareness自我意识的崛起
Aside from Chinese men having a deeper understanding of women, and people's increasing acceptance toward the older woman and younger man combination, a factor that eases Zhang's fear of becoming a leftover women is that a woman's life can be so much more than just securing a marriage.
除了中国男性对女性的了解越加深入外,人们对女性年纪大与男性的婚姻的接受程度一越来越大,还有个因素也消除了Zhang对成为剩女的恐惧,即:除了稳固的婚姻外,女性的生活也可以多彩多姿。
"I think no matter for men or women, the most important thing for us is being able to realize our dreams, live the way we always want and be the best version of ourselves," Zhang said.
“我认为不管是男性还是女性,最重要的是能够意识到我们自己的梦想,按照自己想要的生活方式生活,做最好的自己。”Zhang说道。
"Besides romance and marriage, I have so much more to pursue and enjoy now. I have my own career, my own hobbies such as reading, dancing and traveling and my own social circle. All of those things make me feel fulfilled and help me become a better version of myself," she said.
“除了爱情和婚姻,我有更多的追求和享受现在。我有自己的事业,自己的爱好,就像阅读,跳舞和旅游,也有我自己的社交圈。所有的所有都让我觉得充实,也帮助我变成更好的自己,”她说道。
Zhang said she already feels that she is more feminine and stylish compared to her younger self. She also believes she is more considerate and mature, and said people tell her she is more charming than she used to be.
Zhang说,比起年轻时候的自己,她觉得自己已经变得更有女人味和时尚感了。她也相信她也变得更体贴,更成熟,人们也对她说她比以前更有魅力。
"Along the way, if I can find a man I really like, that's great; if not, I will still be able to enjoy my life and feel good about myself," Zhang said.
“按照目前的状态过下去,如果我可以遇到一个我真的喜欢的男性的话,那是极好的。如果不能的话,我仍旧能享受我的生活,对自我满意。”Zhang说道。
"Although I am not a celebrity like Wendi Deng and Li Bingbing, I hope that as I grow older, I will also become more fabulous, well-rounded, and always know what I want while still being able to live my life the way I want and love the people my heart desires," she said.
“虽然我并非像邓文迪和李冰冰那样的名人,但我希望当我年纪越来越大时,我也能变得越来越好,多才多艺的,面面俱到的,按照自己想要的生活方式生活的同时总是能知道自己要的是什么,按照我内心所爱的去爱别人。”她说道。
译者小结:
又是一年年关近,大龄女性回家被催婚的窘境也会越来越多。然而跟自己携手一辈子的人终究是不能将就的啊。要是只是因为年纪大,年纪到了而选择匆匆进入婚姻的围城里,而非嫁爱情,嫁自己所选,那样终日面对熟悉的陌生人,一天得是48个小时或者更久吧,一辈子也得拉长得像是百年不垂,岁月不老,多难受。
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