preface
Like many other movements, what began as a reaction against an extreme view became an extreme view itself.像其他很多行为举动一样,本以反对极端观点始发的举动,到最后自己却演变成了极端本身。
感悟:想想那些令我们抓狂、愤怒的场景,是不是恰如上面的讽刺。我有一个观点,对方有他的观点,我想说服他,他也想说服我,我生气他的固执,不知不觉我也变成了固执本身。
这么看,说服从来都不是你赢我输的游戏,而是如太极阴阳图一样,在沟通中看到你中有我,我中有你。
There is an unfortunate tendency among many to view feeling and thought as mutually exclusive, to force a choice between them. If we focus on one, then in their view we must reject the other. But this is mis- taken. Feeling and thought are perfectly complementary. Feeling, being more spontaneous, is an excellent beginning to the development of con- clusions. And thought, being more deliberate, provides a way to identify the best and most appropriate feeling. Both are natural.
不幸的是,很多人倾向把感觉和思考视作相互独立的存在,只能在二者中取其一。选择一个,另一个就必须得排斥。但这是误区。感觉和思考是完美的互补组合。感觉,更随性自发,是引发结论的绝佳开始;思考,更深思熟虑,为识别最佳最能传神的感觉提供了一种路径。两者是自然相合的。
感悟:有一句话叫“灰度观察,黑白决策。”,就是说,我们在决策的时候是不能够搞灰度的,但是你观察的时候,要充分意识到你所面对的要素和场景的复杂性。但是,不管你多么细致的感受到场景的复杂性,你必须要做一个决策。
假设换个说法,“黑白观察,灰度决策”,观察的时候黑是黑,白是白,势不两立;可想而知最后决策要么就是站队分山头,要不就是和稀泥你好我好大家好的不置可否。如果后者算是“灰度决策”,那只怕没有存在的必要了。