否认会让情绪触电

  “投影”是一种很有趣的心理现象，我们会不自觉的用潜意识去影响周围的人，让他们表现出为我们所压抑的特质和情感，或是把容易表现出这些特质和情感的人吸引到我们身边，这就是投影的机制。投影是潜意识的一种防御机制，因为某些特质的情感受到了压抑，无法在我们自己身上自由地表现出来，所以又只能诉诸他人和外物。

我们在别人身上注意到的特质都是我们自己所具有的。不妨打个这样的比方：假设你的胸前有一块面板，上面布满了成千上万个电极接口，每个接口都代表了你的一种特质。那些你所承认所接纳的特质对应的接口会被盖板保护起来，所以很安全，不会轻易漏电。但是那些你所压抑所拒绝的特质，对应的接口则没有盖板的保护。当容易表现出这些特质的人接近我们时，他们身上的电极就会自动插进我们的接口。例如我们可以压抑自己心中的愤怒，就会把暴躁易怒的人吸引到我们身边，我们会一边压抑自己的愤怒，一边鄙视那些暴跳如雷的人。我们拒绝承认自己心中的愤怒，所以只能把愤怒投影到别人身上。只有这样我们才有重新认识和接纳愤怒这种情感的机会。

Projection "is a very interesting psychological phenomenon. We will unconsciously use our subconscious to influence the people around us, let them show the characteristics and emotions we repress, or attract people who are easy to show these characteristics and emotions to us, which is the mechanism of projection. Projection is a defense mechanism of the subconscious mind. Because the emotions of certain characteristics are suppressed and cannot be freely expressed on ourselves, we can only resort to others and external objects.

The qualities we notice in others are our own. Let's take an example: suppose you have a panel in front of your chest, which is covered with thousands of electrode interfaces, each of which represents a characteristic of you. The interfaces corresponding to the characteristics you admit will be protected by the cover plate, so it is very safe and will not leak easily. But for those qualities you repress and reject, the corresponding interface is not protected by the cover plate. When people who are easy to show these characteristics approach us, their electrodes will automatically plug into our interface. For example, we can suppress the anger in our hearts, and attract the irascible and irritable people to us. We will suppress our anger and despise those who are furious. We refuse to admit our anger, so we can only project it on others. Only in this way can we have the opportunity to recognize and accept anger again.