——摘自于psychologytoday.com
翻译：小鹿
Admit that it hurts, but don't torture yourself with "what-ifs."
承认你感到受伤，但不要用“如果怎样”来折磨自己。
Assuming that we humans have control over our interpretation of defeat, let’s look at these 8 strategies for overcoming a blow to the ego:
假设我们人类可以掌控我们对于挫败的解读，那么来看看克服一次对小我的打击的8个策略：
1. Build your resistance. A mouse can’t change its interpretation of experiences, but you can. Don’t shy away from those who’ve defeated you—allow yourself to get back out into the field and continue to interact in your own environment.
增强你的抵抗力。一只老鼠没办法改变它对于经历的解读，但你可以。不要躲避那些打击你的人——允许你自己回去，继续在这个环境里与人互动。
2. Admit that it hurts. You don’t have to pretend that you don’t mind losing (unless you truly don’t). Perhaps one of the most truthful statements a politician can make is to admit that winning is better than losing.
承认这让你受伤。你不需要假装你不介意失败（除非你真的不介意）。也许一个政治家可以作出的最坦诚的表达是承认赢比输更好。
3. Learn from the experience so that you can lower your chances of defeat in the future. What was it that led to your loss? Was it a simple lack of strength or was there something you could’ve done differently? If you take this pragmatic, problem-oriented approach, you may come out better prepared the next time.
从经历中学习，因而你就可以降低未来再次受打击的可能性。是什么导致了你的失败？是不是仅仅因为缺少力量呢，或者是有些事你可以以不同的方式来做？如果你采取这个务实的、面向问题的方式，下次你可能就准备得更好。
4. Understand, and then manage, your emotions. It’s interesting that mice didn’t show the effects of social defeat until they reached adulthood. It’s possible that by letting things fester, we humans may be more easily brought down by defeat.
理解，然后应对你的情绪。有趣的是，老鼠直到成年后才会显示出社会打击对它们的影响。有可能是，通过使事情恶化，我们人类也许是更容易被挫折击败。
5. Recognize that not everyone can always be the winner. When we hear about “unsportsmanlike conduct,” this means that a player didn’t adopt the mindset that in sports, someone always has to lose.
承认并不是每个人都可以一直做赢家。当我们听到“无体育精神的操作”时，这代表运动员没有吸收在运动中总会有人输掉这个观念。
6. Don’t torment yourself with “what if’s.” Presidential candidates, as seen in the CNN special, may spend anywhere from days to decades mulling over how the outcome might have been different if they hadn’t made a debate gaffe.Regret is greatif it helps you become a better person, but regret that can’t undo what’s been done has no point.
不要用“如果怎样怎样”来折磨自己。就像我们在CNN特别节目中看到的总统候选人，可能花上数天或数十年到处琢磨如果他们没有在一个辩论中失言，结果会有多么不同。如果后悔能够帮助你成为一个更好的人那么它很好，但后悔并不能撤销做过的毫无意义的事。
7. Congratulate the winner. It’s not only gracious, but self-preserving to put the defeat behind you by letting the other person know that he or she won fair and square. Like a defeated politician, you may end up getting an invitation to be on that person’s team.
祝贺赢家。通过使对方知道他或她赢得光明正大来把挫败置之身后，不仅谦逊有礼，更能自我保护。正如一位战败的政治家，你可能会最终收到邀请进入对方的团队。
8. Find other ways to feel good about yourself. Those defeated little lab mice could only see themselves as losers because, in that context, there wasn’t much else they could do. You, however, can move on and find ways to console yourself by focusing on activities at which you feel successful.
找到其他方式来对自我感觉好一些。这些被打败的小白鼠只能把它们自己当作失败者，因为，在它们所处的实验环境中，它们做不了更多。然而，你可以继续前进，通过专注于你感到成功的事情来找到抚慰自己的方式。
