When someone has deeply hurt you, it can be very difficult to let go of your anger. But forgiveness is possible - and it can be surprisingly helpful to your physical and mental health. Indeed, research has shown that people who forgive have more energy, better appetite and better sleep. “People who forgive show less anger and more hopefulness,” says Dr. Frederic Luskin, who wrote the book Forgive for Good. “So it can help save on the wear and tear on our body and make people feel more energetic.”
当有人深深地伤害了你，你很难释怀你的愤怒。但是宽恕是可行的，它对你的身心健康极为有益。事实上，研究表明，原谅别人的人精力更充沛，吃得好睡得好。《学会宽恕》的作者弗雷德里克·卢斯金博士说：“原谅别人的人更少愤怒，更充满希望。因此有助于减少我们的身体消耗，让人们感觉更有活力。”

So when someone has hurt you, calm down first. Take plenty of breath deeply and think of something that gives you pleasure: a beautiful scene in nature, someone you love. Don’t wait for an apology. “Many times the person who hurt you may never think of apologizing,” says Dr. Luskin. “They may have wanted to hurt you or they just don’t see things the same way. So if you wait for people to apologize, you could be waiting for a very long time.” Keep in mind that forgiveness does not necessarily mean accepting the action of the person who makes you angry. Mentally going over your hurt gives power to the person who brought you pain. Instead, learn to look for the love, beauty and kindness around you. Finally, try to see things from the other person’s perspective. You may realize that he or she was acting out of ignorance, fear, even love. To achieve the perspective, you may write a letter to yourself from that person’s point of view.
所以当有人伤害你时，先冷静下来。深吸一口气，想想能给你带来快乐的事情：自然界的美丽景色，你爱的人。不要等待道歉。“很多时候，伤害你的人可能从来没有想过道歉，”卢斯金博士说，“他们可能想伤害你，或者只是看事情的方式不同。因此，如果你等别人道歉，你可能会等很长时间。”请记住，宽恕并不一定意味着接受让你生气的人的行为。从精神上审视你的伤害会给带给你痛苦的人以力量，相反，学会寻找你周围的爱、美和善良，最后，试着从别人的角度看问题。你可能意识到他是出于无知、恐惧，甚至爱。为了达到这个目的，你可以从那个人的角度给自己写封信。