走进2025 年，我们又将迎接来自新一年的挑战，同时也将收获新一年的成长。

在这样的时刻，我想带大家重温Lucy Hone 在她的 TED 演讲中分享的 3 个让我们变得更有韧性的策略，希望这些策略可以帮助我们在 2025 年变得更有韧性，让我们在愈加不确定的未来中活得更加从容，更加理性，更加不焦虑。

Life doesn't get easier or more forgiving; we get stronger and more resilient.

(生活从来不会变得更容易或更宽容；而是我们变得更强大和更有韧性。）

以下是 Lucy Hone 的 TED 分享，可以对照查看中文和英文内容。

策略1：

有韧性的人明白生活中难免会有糟糕的事情发生。他们知道痛苦是人生的一部分。

Resilient people get that shit happens. They know that suffering is part of life.

这并不意味着他们会真的欢迎痛苦到来，他们并不是不切实际，只是当困难时刻来临时，他们似乎明白痛苦是每个人生中都会经历的一部分。这种认知能够避免我们在面对困境时觉得自己被命运所针对。 

This doesn's mean they actually welcome it in, they're not actually delusional, just that when the tough times come, they seem to know that suffering is part of every human exsitence. Knowing this stops you from feeling discriminated against, when the tough times come. 

策略2：

有韧性的人非常善于谨慎地选择自己所关注的方面。

Resilient people are really good at choosing carefully where they select their attention.

他们习惯于现实地评估情况，通常能够专注于自己可以改变的事情，同时以某种方式接受那些无法改变的事。这项技能对于培养韧性至关重要，并且是可以习得的。作为人类，我们非常擅长发现威胁和自己的弱点。我们的威胁聚焦和压力反应始终处于高敏感状态。有韧性的人并不会忽视这些负面因素，但他们同时也能找到办法来关注到生活中的美好。 

They have a habit of realistically appraising situations and typically managing to focus on the things that they can change and somehow accept the things that they can't. This is a vital, learnable skill for resilience. As humans, we are really good at noticing threats and weakness. Our threat focus, our stress response is permanently dialed up. Resilient people don't diminish the negative, but they also have worked out a way of tuning into the good.

策略3：

有韧性的人会问自己：我正在做的事情是在帮助我自己还是在伤害我自己？

Resilient people ask themselves, is what I'm doing helping or harming me?

这是一个在许多优秀的心理治疗中经常使用的问题，它可以应用于许多不同的情境中。例如，我的思维方式和行为方式是否有助于我获得这次升职，通过这场考试，或者从心脏病中恢复过来？这种对自我追问的提问能够帮助你重新掌控局面，让你在决策时能够更有掌控力。

This is a question that's used a lot in good therapy. This quesiton can be applied to so many different contexts. Is the way I'm thinking and acting helping or harming you in your bid to get that promotion, to pass that exam, to recover from a heart attack? Asking yourself whether what you are doing, the way you are thinking, the way you are acting, is thelping or harming you puts you back in the driver's seat. It gives you some control over your decision-making.